Lamisha Serf-Walls

My BS: Who Am I To Help?

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Earlier this week I shared this post with my VIP tribe and while it’s a bit of a vulnerable post, I realized how important it is for me to share it with you as well.  May you find comfort in knowing that you are not alone and join me in facing your BS head on, because honestly it’s hard to change anything with that junk holding you back.

Ok, it’s time for me to get something off my chest.  It’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently as I have been facing the BS (aka Blind Spot) that has been holding me back and I’m done with it!

The past two months have been pretty tough.  The positive side of me wants to tell you all about the growth, the lessons, and the beautiful blessings in disguise and while there was a lot of that going on that’s not always how it felt. There is another part of me that remembers the worry, the fear, the frustration, and at times the overwhelming tears.In the midst of chaos at home, schedules being thrown out the window, and lots of change going on both personally & professionally, I was forced to face my BS…head on.

The BS I’m talking about is both bull shit & something you may know as my Blind Spot.Yep, in the middle of sharing with you how your BS can hold you back, mine was there waiting for me, trying desperately to get me to not only play small, but quit playing all together. (Funny how that happens right?)  And once I realized what it really was that was holding me back in my business (with the help of another coach), I knew I had to share it with you.

So, here is my most recent experience coming face-to-face with my BS.  My hope is that when you hear my story, you leave with a deeper understanding of how imperative it is to identify and clear your own Blind Spot and you have a bit more compassion for yourself.  Regardless of who you are, what you do, or what area of your life is affected, we all have thoughts & beliefs that are holding us back in our careers, love, relationships, and life in general.  And the best part of all: there is a way to identify and clear it!

Coming face-to-face with your BS isn’t fun or all that comfortable, but I assure you it is the first step to living that amazing, free-flowing, ever expanding life of your dreams.  It is almost as if we believe we can’t or shouldn’t have it all, but as one of my favorite quotes says:

“We ask ourselves: Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?  Actually, who are you not to be?” 

~Marianne Williamson

Go be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous and clear the BS that is in your way!  You have an amazing life of freedom and flow to live so hop to it!

I believe in you,

Confession Time: I Didn’t Listen To My Heart…and I Failed (sort of)

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To be honest with you, I have been dreading writing this post.  Part of me knew I had to do some processing mentally and emotionally before I could put anything in writing and the other part of me was just plain embarrassed.

Embarrassed of looking like a fraud, a scam, a loser and my worst fear…a FAILURE.

So what did I fail at exactly?

I failed at listening to my intuition when it told me something wasn’t a good fit.

I failed at recognizing the signs that reinforced something wasn’t a good fit.

I failed at standing in my power to declare to myself and YOU that it’s ok to pull the plug on something that isn’t a good fit.

So what is this elusive ‘thing’ that isn’t a good fit?

The 90-Days To Biz Brilliance program.

Yep, the program I was so excited about (initially before the signs) and the same program I put off releasing twice for various reasons (because I clearly ignored the signs.)

The short story is this.  I fell into the trap of thinking that other people know me better than myself and while some of my clients are female entrepreneurs, I am not a ‘business coach’.  Here’s where it gets a little confusing even for me.  The biz brilliance program is actually full of amazing content, support, information, and practices to handle the stuff that comes up when you are creating a business, but it is also good for people NOT in business.

I was excited about the program.  I shared it with you and in various other networks happily.  I loved the feeling of the program, but something I couldn’t quite put my finger on felt off.  The more I shared, the more off it felt.  And when the feeling got to be too much, I knew that it wasn’t going to fly, but I was too afraid to pull the plug for fear of looking unprofessional.  I didn’t want anyone to think any less of me and to see me the way I was seeing me in that moment…a failure.

But despite all of that this is what I have learned:

  • I now know what the off feeling feels like in my body and I can use that in the future
  • I took a HUGE step to create a program that has good bones and can be used in another way…later
  • I am not a failure
  • I now have more clarity about what isn’t a good fit for me, which is equally as important as knowing what is
  • Life (and my business) goes on despite this bump in the road
  • Listening to my intuition and inner wisdom is always the best way

It is imperative to trust that tiny whisper within that tells you something isn’t right and the nudge you get to go in a particular direction.  Learn to listen to yourself and let go of the other stuff that doesn’t feel right for you.  Tap into your intuition on a daily basis and allow it to guide you forward.  It takes practice, I know especially when you are in business and there are so formulas for ‘success’.  Your success will come to you in a way that feels right and fits your path.

Another big thing this experience taught me is that trying is succeeding in its own right, so keep trying.  Keep experimenting and keep going.  Do you know how many times Albert Einstein ‘failed’ in his experiments before he got one ‘right’?  If one of the most amazing scientific geniuses in history can ‘fail’ a few times to get to something incredible, then don’t you think we can too?

Life is about experience, so remember that as you try and try (and try) again.  Don’t forget to trust too.  Trust is a big part of the process.  Knowing that you will get to where you are going as long as you keep going.

 

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P.S. We are entering the last 4 months of the year (where does the time go!) and I know there are dreams and goals that you have been procrastinating on.  It’s time to get a Jump Start don’t you think? My 1-month Jump Start package is available to help you take big action and get moving immediately toward your dreams.  Haven’t you waited long enough?  Get signed up for your free 30-minute consultation to get started for September. 

Worst-Case Scenarios & Why I Have No Plan ‘B’

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Throughout my life I learned early on that if I could plan for the ‘worst-case scenario’ then I would be fully prepared for anything.  If something better happened, I would be delighted, but if the worst case actually occurred, well then I would have a plan of action.  Or in the least, I wouldn’t be disappointed.

It worked for a while (and by ‘worked’ I mean life went on and I didn’t question my thoughts too much).

Looking back now, I realize by planning for the worst case scenario, I actually created it.

I’ll give you an example.

Several years ago I was planning a big move for love (I’m such a romantic and lucky for me it worked out because we are now happily married).  Being the planner that I was, I didn’t want to move to a new place without a job lined up especially since I was moving 300+ miles away from home and I had no idea what the employment situation was like.

For months I searched from afar and got little to no feedback.  I was discouraged and distraught until I finally decided to move anyway.  I decided that if I couldn’t find a job right away, my worst-case scenario was that I would simply get a job at Starbucks.

I repeated those same words over and over again to my friends and family members.

“Oh it’s fine. Worst-case scenario I’ll just get a job at Starbucks.”

(You know where this is going right?)

While it wasn’t an absolutely terrible worst case situation, I manifested it exactly.

After a month or so of applying with no luck, I got a job at Starbucks.

Depending on how you look at it you can view this as an incredible manifestation.  I fully believed that if all else failed, I would just work at Starbucks…which I did for 6 months.

What’s my point?

Planning for worst-case scenarios have the power to actually create the situation you ‘planned’ for.  But do you really want to create a ‘worst case’?

I have learned from that very clear example of my manifestation abilities and no longer plan for those types of situations.

At this stage in my life and business, it means having no Plan B.

There is no ‘worst case scenario’ or alternate plan if my business doesn’t work.  It’s not even a thought in my mind because I know that by planning for it, I am giving my very specific and creative power to something I don’t want.

My plan is to succeed and have my business continue to flourish and thrive.  That’s my plan…all of it.

So, the thoughts of getting a ‘real job’ are no more because that isn’t an option.  The ONLY option is my business and you know why?  It’s because it is what I am meant to do.

Sure it’s risky.  It’s scary at times. It’s a bit outside the box. Hell, it’s unpredictable more often than not and I am still learning a ton about myself and my business as I go.

BUT

It’s also freeing, fantastic, and the best thing I have ever done…aside from moving for love.  Every day I wake up with a purpose.  I love my work. I love my clients. And I love the freedom that this journey provides for me.

Yep, this is my purpose and my heart-centered gift to share with the world and despite what seemingly difficult roadblocks I encounter, succeeding in my business is the only option. No more Plan B or worst-case scenarios for this girl.

Nope, I’m putting my all into my business and by doing that there is no way I can fail.

Your Actionable Item: Today I want you to take a look back over your life to see where you might have planned for the ‘worst-case’.  Did it happen?  Are you planning for one now?  Is it something you want to create?  If not, what DO you want to create?

Do you have a Plan B for if your dreams don’t come true? I want to know your thoughts so share them in the comments below.

And if you have a heart-centered business that you are ready to bring a bit of brilliance to, I have good news for you.  My 90-Days to Biz Brilliance group coaching program is open for registration!  The program officially begins August 7th and I am so excited to finally bring this to life.  I know that your work is important to you and if it is feeling less than brilliant at the moment, it’s time for a change.  Why not get together with other amazing souls going through a similar experience to grow and transform your biz?  This is your chance! If you register by July 21st, you are also going to receive my Invest in Yourself self-study program (valued at $97) before it is even available for sale.  

I want this program to reach as many amazing biz beauties as possible so will you help me by sharing this with your network and tribe?

Biz Brilliance: What it is & Why you need it.

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So excited to share this with you! Biz Brilliance for you in 90 days!

Do you know someone who could use a bit of brilliance in their biz?  Share this with your network and spread the love! Registration opens July 7th!

 

Gratitude: Small Successes, Family, and Living In the Now

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I missed my gratitude post last week, but I didn’t want to miss it again this week because there is so much to be grateful for.

When I first started my blog, I had put some time in effort in deciding on a name, but I hadn’t gone much further than that regarding readership etc.  Well I am so excited to share that this week I hit 100 followers on my blog.  To some it may be a teeny-tiny success, but it is one worth mentioning.  I had no idea if anyone would read my words of advice let alone follow my blog, but I am so grateful for all of you who read my posts (followers or not).  I hope my blog following continues to grow through the rest of the year as I have some exciting things planned as my business takes shape.  Thank you for reading, liking, and commenting on my posts.  It truly means the world to me.

The other thing I am grateful for this week is family.  My partner, my son, and I all live fairly far from our immediate families so when we get to see them it is truly a treat.  This weekend is one of those rare treats and we will be enjoying some fun (albeit short) time together.  In addition to family coming into town, my partner and I are taking our son fishing for the first time which should be very exciting.  As we spend precious time with one another, I am reminded to enjoy each and every moment for what it is.

Too often, I allow myself to get hung up on what is coming, what I am planning, what I am creating, and my list of items to complete, that I overlook what is right in front of me.  So, as we move into the weekend, I hope you too embrace each precious moment for what it is and enjoy the beauty that surrounds you.  I know I will.

As always have a lovely weekend and thank you for reading!image