Lamisha Serf-Walls

Make Room For Your Dreams

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I read a post last night from a friend regarding her experience of the “stuff” that is weighing her down and her intentions of letting it go.  It reminded me of something I have been thinking about for a few weeks now, as I have been making attempts to also clear out the old, to make room for the new (whatever that entails).

Have you ever heard the saying that when you open your hand to let go, it is also open to receive?  It can also be said that you must first let go of a little bit of your control to allow your dreams to manifest.  I think the same goes for making space, both literally and mentally, for your dreams to come true.  We often forget that in order to bring something new into our lives, we have to let go of the things that no longer serve us, be it behaviors, beliefs, or tangible objects that are blocking our ability to receive the resources we need to move forward.  Sometimes those beliefs, objects, or behaviors are all that we know and letting go of what we have always known for something that we can’t yet see is a scary venture.  I know, I have been there before.

The truth is our dreams are not guaranteed, but then again you could say that about anything in life.  The best we can do is have faith in ourselves and trust that we are not traveling this path by chance.  We are instead making a choice to live a life full of experiences, adventure and fulfilling our deepest desires and many times we must be willing to walk into the unknown to do it and sometimes that means letting go of the things that no longer serve your current reality to make room for the life you dream of.

I have always been much better at letting go of physical things than I am with letting go of my control (or perceived control as it may be).  I often find myself at the end of each season looking into my closet and donating items that no longer fit or things I haven’t worn in over a year.  I would much rather have the added space than the item I won’t use again.  When it comes to letting go of my expectations of myself or the beliefs I hold true about how my dreams should manifest, I am a bit more reluctant to let go.  Maybe it is because I am such a planner and when I get set on one plan, I begin to limit other possibilities.  Recently I have been thinking of what “stuff” I might need to let go of in order to receive the flow of energy, resources, and other contacts I need in order to make my dreams come true.

How can I make room for my dreams?

The first thing that comes to mind is time.  I hear people talking (myself included) about the lack of time they have, when really it is more about how you allocate your time.  Do you spend it doing things that will help benefit your dreams and goals or do you use it doing things that you feel you have to do?  Why not free up some time to do the things that will bring you closer to your dreams, no matter what it is?  For me this includes writing almost everyday.  I could become a much better writer if I committed to writing a little bit everyday and I could make the time if I got up only 30 minutes earlier each day.

Another thing I could do is clear out the belief that my dreams have to manifest based on the exact plan I have come up with.  My plan stems from what I believe is most feasible and realistic in achieving my dreams.  It is how I have come to know the world and my own abilities within it.  I know that by doing this I am not allowing the other innumerable possibilities to be an option.  My focus is so set on how I want it to happen, that I am quite possibly missing signs that could lead me in a direction I haven’t thought about.  I am by no means an expert in all the wonderful possibilities that my dreams could manifest, so how can I believe that there is only one way to do it?

I can’t.

I must be able to let go of the notion that I have it all planned out.  Sometimes, (actually most times) I don’t have the only way to do something and I frequently don’t even know the best way to do things.  When I let go of the idea that there is only one way to create my dreams, many more options present themselves.  The key is letting go and having faith that my dreams will come to fruition even if it isn’t the way I thought it would.  If I continue to believe in myself and my abilities and open my hands to release a bit of my control, my energy is then free to flow to the other possibilities that come my way.

So how can you make room for your dreams?  Do your dreams require you to pare down your belongings so you can travel the world for a year?  Maybe you want to start that business you have always wanted, but it means you have to free up some time, money, and space for that business to come alive.  Whatever dreams you have, what can you do to make room for them?

Winds Of Change

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My how the winds of change sweep in so quickly, or so it has seemed recently.  I mentioned last week how I had some good feelings about the rest of the year.  I felt like something was on the verge of happening in my writing world and it was going to be great.  I also mentioned that what I thought was going to happen didn’t.  With that said the winds of change are blowing and they are blowing in an unexpected, unforeseen opportunity that will help me move forward towards beginning my life coach training program.

What is it you ask?

This week I was notified of a change in some of my work responsibilities at my day job that will mean more work, more hours, but some extra income as well.  Doesn’t sound like a good change does it? Actually it is a good thing because the added income will be just what I need to move towards setting a date to begin my life coach training (more on that later).  It is also a reason to celebrate because I feel like I am truly making progress and progress is always a good thing.

I am also seeing change  in a new light.

Change and I have never been friends, in fact change is something that I both crave and fear.  Not knowing where my path may lead fills me with both excitement and dread as I begin to think of all of the possibilities that can come from it.  I guess it also depends on what type of change we are talking about, but this type of change that allows me to move forward towards my dreams is a change I am ready to make.  And while the added income will be great, there are some other trade offs I have to be willing to make in the short-term.

One of which is more work and potentially more stress.  More items on my to-do list that will require more organization and balance of my time.  Add to that weekend hours that I am not used to and the potential for a very chaotic, stress-filled experience.  But, since I know this ahead of time I am choosing to be proactive in my efforts.  Planning my time accordingly and remembering the benefits of this current sacrifice.  More money and more savings mean I can begin my training much sooner.

In addition to that, the more time I spend in a job that I don’t love is more motivation to work on getting my ducks in a row to begin my journey towards my life coaching business.  This may be a mini step and a little sacrifice, but in my book it is also a huge opportunity to move forward.  And for that I am thankful as I welcome the winds of change, for they are not only changing this moment, but have the opportunity to change the rest of my life.

Maybe change isn’t so bad after all.

Success Redefined

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I have made it just past a month since starting this blog (woohoo!) and I am very proud.  Not only have I stuck with my writing every week day, but I have also managed to keep my creativity flowing and I have found that I am never lacking in material or ideas.  Success!!

Or is it?

When I started using WordPress as a platform for my blog, I was (and still am) very excited about how easy it is to use.  For a newbie like myself it was easy to set up and start blogging, and while there are still many things to learn, I feel confident with what I post each day.  In addition to the easy set up, I found (rather quickly) there is some great statistical information you can get in one click of your mouse.  Information about how many people viewed your posted, what country they are from, the number of “likes” for each post, and how many followers you have.  And being the numbers gal that I am, sometimes I find myself obsessing about the numbers.  How many views do I have today?  How many “likes” do I have?  Any new followers?

Crazy right?

I know I just started this magnificently creative, and courageous journey and though I keep telling myself that “every new blog takes time to grow”, I feel a little disappointed in the numbers.  If one of my posts doesn’t have many likes or views, I am starting to wonder about my content.  Is it boring?  Did I post too late or too early?  Should I have certain topics on certain days? Questions that are taking my focus away from my flow of creativity and joy in my writing.  And since I started this blog for two reasons, (to inspire, empower, and motivate others to achieve their dreams as well as to have a creative outlet for my thoughts), I realized that getting the most likes or followers on my blog is not as important and should not be my main focus.

Easy to say, not as easy to do.

So I am redefining success as it pertains to my blog.  Creating a blog and sticking with it was one of my dreams and here I am blogging about it.  I am enjoying the creativity, thoughts, and muses that come about in my daily life because of my blog and am happy to share with others in hopes that as they venture towards their goals, they will know that they are not alone in their journey.  I am enjoying the journey, the connection with other bloggers, and my own space to share my thoughts, visions, words, etc.  I’d say that is a success, a mini success maybe, but a success none the less.  And as my blog continues to grow (and it will), my definition of success may also change.  One day, I might set a goal for a certain number of followers/likes/blog awards etc., but I’m not there yet.  As for today, I am enjoying the process of creating something that matters to me.  And while I will still check out the numbers and statistics (because I’m curious), I will not allow my confidence to waver if I don’t have as much traffic, or “likes”, because while they are great, they are not the reason I am on this journey.  Those things do not define me as a blogger, writer, creator or person, but in time as I continue to make progress in my writing and blogging, those things will grow naturally.  It just takes time and patience. 

That is the great thing about goals.  When you create your dreams or goals, you get to decide what is successful and what isn’t.  For instance, if you are looking to lose a certain amount of weight, you are bound to have a bunch of little successes along the way and it is important to celebrate them as you go.  It builds the momentum and positive energy you will need to stay the course and reach your ultimate goal.  Same thing goes for any goal really.  If you are starting a business, celebrate when you decide on the name of that business.  Celebrate when you find the space for that business.  Celebrate when you have 2 clients, or when you have 10.

The main thing to remember is to celebrate the journey because it is there that you will find many little successes that once built upon, create the life you once dreamt.

Think about it.  How do you define success as it pertains to your most current dream?  I would love to know.

Gratitude: Family Time and Sunrises

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With the holidays upon us and Thanksgiving just around the corner, I have decided to increase my gratitude practice to list one thing I am grateful for during the month of November (and hopefully December as well), on my Facebook page.  I am doing this because in the time I have begun regularly practicing gratitude, I have found such a tremendous change in my overall attitude about life, abundance, and what it means to be happy.  I am finding that I am blessed beyond measure in so many ways, even if my dreams were never to manifest (though I know they will).  I invite you to also join in the 30 days of gratitude for the month of November and see how it makes you feel, and what changes you notice in your own life.

 

This week the first thing I am grateful for is family time.  Being a mother is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given and spending special time with my son and partner are absolutely priceless.  This week we did a little pumpkin carving, attended an Elmo and Friends event, and went trick or treating as a family.  I absolutely love the time we get to spend together, particularly the moments when I get to see my son smiling, or I can look at my partner and see the joy in her eyes.  It is during those times that I am fully awake and aware of the moment and nothing is more important than our little family.  I also find myself thanking the Divine for being blessed with so much love to give the two most important people in my life and as we venture towards adding to our family (hopefully in the near future), I look forward to more family time and more love to share.

This week I am also grateful for the beautiful sunrises I am blessed with each and every morning.  Living in South Carolina, I have been drawn to the vast beautiful skies both during the day and at night.  Each morning as I take my son to daycare it is quite dark and we have begun a practice of admiring the stars and the moon as we leave.  On my way home, this morning I was amazed at the gorgeous sunrise that greeted me just over the horizon.  I would have taken a picture to include here, but I was driving and was too mesmerized to even attempt to capture it on my cell phone.  The beauty took my breath away and reminded me yet again of the beauty that surrounds us everyday if we are open to it.

I hope you all have a marvelous weekend and remember the wonderful blessings you have, especially as so many are still struggling without power, heat, and basic necessities in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.  My prayers are with the victims that are working to get their lives back to normal in the wake of this natural disaster.

Source of Inspiration

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I have been thinking a lot about inspiration lately, mostly because I have had an unlimited supply of inspirational thoughts, musings, readings, and quotes that I have come across lately.  And as I have been blogging for almost a month now, I have never had a moment where I didn’t have something to write about.  (Fingers crossed that doesn’t change.)  More specifically I have been thinking about the source of our inspiration to continually work towards accomplishing our goals and dreams. Where does it come from?

 

What is your source of inspiration?

Is it purely the satisfaction of accomplishing another goal? Or are you like me and you have this undying need to help make the world a better place one person at a time?  Maybe your dream is to start a business and money is your motivator, but is money going to keep you going?  I am not saying money is a bad thing at all, in fact I love money! (Well, actually I love what money allows me to do.)  But when it comes to your life purpose, your dreams, the fire that burns within, what keeps you going?

If I were to answer that question about my dreams, I guess it would depend on the specific dream.  For instance, wanting to run a mini-marathon is purely for the challenge and accomplishment factor.  The training and preparation needed for such a task also allows me to get into shape and live a healthier life which is an added bonus.  My inspiration for writing a book is partially accomplishment based, but more about the fact that I want to inspire, motivate, and move more people in the direction of their dreams and writing a book that reach the masses seems like a good start.  My inspiration for becoming a life coach is also about reaching out to people and empowering them to accomplish their dreams too.  To think outside the box of “reality” or the reality they have been taught, to find the undying power that lies within when you truly believe in yourself.  Helping others, and being a source of their inspiration has been something I have always enjoyed and it continues to light the fire with in me to just keep going and never give up.

You want to know what else inspires me?  People doing what they love.  When I see someone living their dreams, doing the thing that brings so much joy into their lives, I am more motivated.  I feel good and I know that one day that will be me and I hope that whatever I choose to do, I do it with the joy and zest that I see in others, because it is contagious!

Have you ever thought about the things that inspire you on a daily basis?  Have you ever taken note of the things that drive you to continually give it your all?  If now, now is the time to do so, because when you know what inspires you, you can always turn to those things, people, books, when you are in need of a little pick me up.

So I ask you this…

What is your source of inspiration?