Lamisha Serf-Walls

How I’m Building My Life Coaching Dream

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In my last post I talked about my current midnight hustle and how my life coach training may have to be put on hold longer than I originally had planned, however I wanted to give you a little bit of insight into how I am keeping my focus strong on my dream of inspiring and changing lives through coaching.

I decided just before starting this blog, that I wanted to do something now that would  not only support my journey to becoming a life coach, but also keep me inspired, motivated, and focused on my vision.  Since I am very much a do-er, I wanted something that I could do besides sit and daydream about “one day when”.  Over time the list of things I am doing to prepare for my business has grown and I am delighted to share them with you in hopes that you find a bit of inspiration to take action on part of your dreams, even if you have to wait for other pieces to fall into place.

So far here is what I am doing to prepare, plan, and focus on my business:

Research -When I first realized I wanted to be a life coach, I had no idea where to begin, so naturally I enlisted the help of the internet and did as much research as possible.  I wanted to see how other coaches had gotten started, where they studied, and what they were doing.  I even spent some time interviewing people who were in the coaching business.  This piece has been essential and while I did most of my research in the very beginning, I still do a bit here and there as I begin thinking about what I want my business to look like.

Blog – As my excitement grew, I felt like I had to do more than just read about coaching.  I realized I was already coaching friends, family, and co-workers in one way or another, so why not use my writing to reach out and inspire others?  After many months of intentionally planning the focus for my blog, in October 2012 I started writing.  I decided my blog would eventually turn into a portion of my business page and what better way to launch a business than to have readers to launch it to?

Brainstorm – This seems like a no-brainer, but I have spent some time over the last year simply writing down ideas, thoughts, possible business names, and things I would like to offer within my coaching.  In fact, I have a notebook dedicated to my business ideas and the best part about it is I just let my creativity flow.  I don’t limit anything that I write or judge it as good or bad, I simply brainstorm.  Who knows what it might turn into?

Collect Information – A few months ago I started a folder in my email entitled “Business”.  In it I collect newsletters, blogs, advice, and other information that I receive from various websites I subscribe to and my intuition tells me this is going to be very beneficial later.  Much of the advice may not apply to me right now, but it is something I can use in the future.  For instance the last one I received today was from Jess Lively in her “Wish I Knew Wednesday” post about dealing with worry and doubt as it applies to business.  I highly recommend being added to her newsletter if you are thinking of starting or have your own business and want some advice from someone who has been running her own business since she was 15.  And since I didn’t study business in college and am a newbie to being my own boss one day, I will take all the advice I can get.

Learning– One other item I am doing a little bit of is studying other coaches and their methods as well as gaining valuable insight from a free training program a dear friend sent me.  I love learning and the more information and knowledge I have before I actually launch my business, the more confidant I will be.  So I am taking full advantage of any information I stumble upon that may add to my training (even before training), or my business knowledge.

Allowing – I had to add this tidbit of info because while it seems that I am actively planning and building my dream, that isn’t exactly the case.  I am simply allowing things to unfold organically.  Conversations lead to research and research leads to books with tons of information etc.  I am keeping an open mind and following the flow of life.  I know in due time my dream will become real

So in a nutshell that is how I am planning for my business that I have yet to create.  My vision is growing more realistic, vibrant, and exciting everyday and I can’t wait for the day I get to experience it.  The truth is it’s far more than a vision, this is my dream on a journey to becoming reality.

 

Do The (Midnight) Hustle

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Over the last few years I have come in contact with a handful of innovators looking to start (or recently started) their own businesses in various ways.  Some people were following their creative hearts, while others were simply looking for a way to be their own boss and spend more time with their families, but regardless of what these people were doing, one thing was common amongst them, the midnight hustle.

If you don’t know what that is let me explain.  The midnight hustle is the way many new business owners, creators, and innovators make their business dreams a reality.  Let’s face it, not many of us have the riches to simply quit our day jobs to follow our dreams without cultivating and growing our business on the side and by “on the side”, it likely means during the midnight hours when other people are sleeping, hence the name midnight hustle.  And with that midnight hustling often comes late nights, less sleep, hard work, and hopefully amazing inspiration to keep you moving toward your dreams so you can one day quit your day job and enjoy the fruits of your labor doing something that you truly enjoy.  And while I am far from quitting my day job, I am experiencing a bit of my own hustle as I reach beyond my comfort zone into new opportunities and new territory.  It’s exciting and terrifying all at the same time.

I have talked a little bit about my dream of starting my own life coaching business, but the truth is my dream isn’t to start the business per se, it is really to help people through my business.  I thought the path would be fairly straight forward, but I am finding that I may be taking a bit more of the scenic route as opposed to the straight shot as I go with the flow of life.  The programs I have found in the last year haven’t really touched me in the way that makes me think, “Yes this is the ONE!”, so I have been researching various programs in hopes to find the one that best fits my purpose and calling.  I think I have finally found it.  (YAY!) But, with it comes a pretty hefty price tag, one that is about double the price of the last program I was going to settle on.  So, it looks like the actual training may be put off longer than expected, but as you well know I am not one to sit around and do nothing and being the jack of many trades that I am, I am following an equally creative and exciting interest, writing.

The truth is I have always enjoyed writing but I have just recently begun to make some money from it and it is becoming a bit of a midnight hustle for me.  While I only have one regular gig right now, I am learning that the key to having one or many midnight hustles is balance and knowing your limit, both things I am working on right now.  I am very aware of the amount of time I have in my days (and nights) to complete writing projects and am working on a bit of a writing schedule that will allow me to continue to share my journey here on my blog (because I love it so much), and to still complete writing projects in a timely manner.  My hope is that my current midnight hustle will help support the training I need for life coaching and things will seamlessly flow with one another leading to (one day) quitting my day job to do something I love.  But, until that day comes I am going to consciously balance my time to include self-care, meditation, and family because life shouldn’t be all about work, it should be fun too.

Do you have a midnight hustle? If so what is it?

My No Plan-Plan

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It has been almost a week since my last post and I am so glad to be back.  The last few days I have been traveling with my family and while I typically hold a certain level of expectation for what we plan on doing each day and have a general plan in mind, this time was different.  This time we couldn’t exactly operate on our own accord since the reason for our travels was work-related for my partner and my son and I were just tagging along.  This week I have quickly learned to let go and I must admit, it has been pretty nice.

Generally I like to know what to expect regarding schedules and routines and quite frankly I really enjoy being able to control it.  (Did I just admit that???) I know I can’t always control what is going on and one of the things that makes life an adventure is the joy of the unexpected.  Learning and growing when things get a little hairy and ultimately learning to go with the flow.  This trip has helped me with that lesson.

While we had a loose understanding of what was going to happen during our trip and had an idea of the schedule (as much as you can when you are dealing with the military), we soon realized that “schedule” was sort of a joke.  Within a matter of 24 hours the plan had changed 4 times and it became very clear that we weren’t going to have as much free time as we previously thought.  If this had happened earlier in the year, the control freak in me would have been agitated, annoyed, and just plain angry that we were now unable to do all the fun things we had planned.  The new “go with the flow” side of me just accepted it and made the plan to have no plan.  Ironic isn’t it?

This whole no plan plan is not something I plan on utilizing in every avenue of my life because I really do have to have a plan for my dreams, goals, and many work related tasks, but learning to flow with the energy of life is a HUGE lesson for me.  If you know me personally you will understand that at times I can be a bit of a drama queen and can get very riled up when things don’t go as planned.  I have lived that way for as long as I can remember and yet now I feel like a new me is emerging.  Maybe it is because the year is coming to an end and I am beginning to think of the possibilities of the new year and what I can do to make it the best year yet.  Though I believe that is partially true, I don’t think I set this no plan plan intentionally.  I think it has simply grown out of my experience on this trip.

Intentional or not, this is a great lesson for me to learn.  It is one lesson I am happy to take with me into 2013 and beyond.  I believe a new me is emerging and I can’t wait to see what the new year brings and as we get closer and closer to 2013 there are some other things I would love to share and discuss with you, so check back often to read about my reflections on this past year and my loose intentions for 2013.  I can’t wait to hear about your intentions.

 

The Bright Side of the Flu

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If I thought last week was a bunch of mayhem, I clearly had no idea what was in store for this weekend.  Let’s just say, life has a way of telling you to slow down and let go.

This weekend was spent taking care of my sick son, which involved sleepless nights and a trip to the ER.  Luckily it was nothing but a bit from the flu bug.  A flu bug that was very effective and efficient at taking down myself and my partner in the process.  Two sick adults tending to a sick child is enough to make for a bad comedy, or a good one depending on your sense of humor.  And since I am prone to seeing the silver lining and the bright side to every situation here is what I learned the last few days:

  • With less than 4 hours of sleep and a cranky toddler, coffee can give me enough energy to make it through the day but only one day
  • Sometimes no matter how urgent I believe certain tasks are, the truth is nothing is more important than our health
  • Rest is a must, with or without illness
  • Parents working together (even while sick) are much better than one parent trying to do it all
  • Juggling 2 doctors visits, a sick toddler, a visit to the pharmacy, and trying to rest is a recipe for disaster OR strength, in my case we proved not only how well we work together, but how strong we are even when we are under the weather
  • The flu-shot might be a very good idea for next year 🙂

While the last few days have hardly been a walk in the park and my list of to-do’s have more or less gone out the window, I am realizing that life happens all the time and I don’t have to control everything.  We get sick, we get better, but the main thing is that we will be ok, no matter what and there is nothing better than realizing that.

As we continue to mend and get healthier by the day, I am reminded just how lucky we truly are to have the insurance, benefits, medication, and mutual support for each other and our family and for that I am grateful.  May this week be more normal for all of us, but if it isn’t and the mayhem continues through the end of the year, I know we will not only survive, but we will thrive!

Make Room For Your Dreams

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I read a post last night from a friend regarding her experience of the “stuff” that is weighing her down and her intentions of letting it go.  It reminded me of something I have been thinking about for a few weeks now, as I have been making attempts to also clear out the old, to make room for the new (whatever that entails).

Have you ever heard the saying that when you open your hand to let go, it is also open to receive?  It can also be said that you must first let go of a little bit of your control to allow your dreams to manifest.  I think the same goes for making space, both literally and mentally, for your dreams to come true.  We often forget that in order to bring something new into our lives, we have to let go of the things that no longer serve us, be it behaviors, beliefs, or tangible objects that are blocking our ability to receive the resources we need to move forward.  Sometimes those beliefs, objects, or behaviors are all that we know and letting go of what we have always known for something that we can’t yet see is a scary venture.  I know, I have been there before.

The truth is our dreams are not guaranteed, but then again you could say that about anything in life.  The best we can do is have faith in ourselves and trust that we are not traveling this path by chance.  We are instead making a choice to live a life full of experiences, adventure and fulfilling our deepest desires and many times we must be willing to walk into the unknown to do it and sometimes that means letting go of the things that no longer serve your current reality to make room for the life you dream of.

I have always been much better at letting go of physical things than I am with letting go of my control (or perceived control as it may be).  I often find myself at the end of each season looking into my closet and donating items that no longer fit or things I haven’t worn in over a year.  I would much rather have the added space than the item I won’t use again.  When it comes to letting go of my expectations of myself or the beliefs I hold true about how my dreams should manifest, I am a bit more reluctant to let go.  Maybe it is because I am such a planner and when I get set on one plan, I begin to limit other possibilities.  Recently I have been thinking of what “stuff” I might need to let go of in order to receive the flow of energy, resources, and other contacts I need in order to make my dreams come true.

How can I make room for my dreams?

The first thing that comes to mind is time.  I hear people talking (myself included) about the lack of time they have, when really it is more about how you allocate your time.  Do you spend it doing things that will help benefit your dreams and goals or do you use it doing things that you feel you have to do?  Why not free up some time to do the things that will bring you closer to your dreams, no matter what it is?  For me this includes writing almost everyday.  I could become a much better writer if I committed to writing a little bit everyday and I could make the time if I got up only 30 minutes earlier each day.

Another thing I could do is clear out the belief that my dreams have to manifest based on the exact plan I have come up with.  My plan stems from what I believe is most feasible and realistic in achieving my dreams.  It is how I have come to know the world and my own abilities within it.  I know that by doing this I am not allowing the other innumerable possibilities to be an option.  My focus is so set on how I want it to happen, that I am quite possibly missing signs that could lead me in a direction I haven’t thought about.  I am by no means an expert in all the wonderful possibilities that my dreams could manifest, so how can I believe that there is only one way to do it?

I can’t.

I must be able to let go of the notion that I have it all planned out.  Sometimes, (actually most times) I don’t have the only way to do something and I frequently don’t even know the best way to do things.  When I let go of the idea that there is only one way to create my dreams, many more options present themselves.  The key is letting go and having faith that my dreams will come to fruition even if it isn’t the way I thought it would.  If I continue to believe in myself and my abilities and open my hands to release a bit of my control, my energy is then free to flow to the other possibilities that come my way.

So how can you make room for your dreams?  Do your dreams require you to pare down your belongings so you can travel the world for a year?  Maybe you want to start that business you have always wanted, but it means you have to free up some time, money, and space for that business to come alive.  Whatever dreams you have, what can you do to make room for them?