Lamisha Serf-Walls

A Lesson in Leaning Back

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photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc
photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc

I’ll be the first to admit when I want something, I can become hyper-focused on it. (Ok maybe a little obsessed.)

I think about it.  I visualize it. I analyze it. I talk about it.

I often jump into action mode quickly and can sometimes forget to listen to my heart.

When it comes to my business and my goals, I often lunge forward when what I truly need to do is lean back and trust.

Today I was reminded of the importance of leaning back.

I’ve been working a bit on expansion in my life and in my business and part of that means reaching outside my comfort zone.

I’m taking risks and stepping into the spotlight so much more than I have before.  It’s exciting, exhilarating, and honestly it feels so right. 

But, in the midst of taking inspired action and clearing my own BS, I sometimes come to a point when I get too focused on the outcome.

I want results and I want them…last week.

The result?

Lots of resistance, disappointment, feelings of lack, and taking forced action as opposed to inspired. (It’s not pretty.)

But, lucky for me I have an amazing support system including my own business coach who reminds me when it’s time to just lean back.

So, what is leaning back really?

To put it simply, it’s trusting the process and staying the course.  It’s detaching from the results and knowing that everything is working out perfectly.  It also means that you know that whatever it is you are trying to manifest or achieve is already done.

It’s happening now.  The money, relationship, career, and clients you want are on the way.  When you stay the course and know it is all coming to you now, you don’t have to worry. You can just enjoy the ride.

I’ll give you another example of what happens when you lean back.

A friend of mine was having a few slow weeks in her business.  She was doing the work and trying hard to figure things out.  She was in action all the time, until one day when she decided she needed a break.  Both her mind & body needed a reprieve from all the action so she took a few days off. She lounged around in her comfy clothes and allowed herself some time to just rest.  In the middle of her second day of rest, she gets a call from a new client.

Leaning back allows the energy you have put into motion to do the work for you. 

No more pushing, prodding, or forcing things to happen.

So if you find yourself feeling anxious and are being busy for the sake of being busy.  Try a different approach.

Just lean back. Let go. Let it flow, and remember you have the power to create & enjoy the life of your dreams.  Sometimes that means letting go of the reins so the powers of the Universe can work for you.

Do you feel like you are forcing a particular area of your life right now?  If so, what is it? Share in the comments below and commit to leaning back for a few days.

P.S.  Have you signed up for my VIP list?  If not you can do so here.  I have some fun giveaways & exclusive offers that I am working on for the next few months that are only accessible to my VIP List so get signed up so you don’t miss out. 

Worst-Case Scenarios & Why I Have No Plan ‘B’

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Throughout my life I learned early on that if I could plan for the ‘worst-case scenario’ then I would be fully prepared for anything.  If something better happened, I would be delighted, but if the worst case actually occurred, well then I would have a plan of action.  Or in the least, I wouldn’t be disappointed.

It worked for a while (and by ‘worked’ I mean life went on and I didn’t question my thoughts too much).

Looking back now, I realize by planning for the worst case scenario, I actually created it.

I’ll give you an example.

Several years ago I was planning a big move for love (I’m such a romantic and lucky for me it worked out because we are now happily married).  Being the planner that I was, I didn’t want to move to a new place without a job lined up especially since I was moving 300+ miles away from home and I had no idea what the employment situation was like.

For months I searched from afar and got little to no feedback.  I was discouraged and distraught until I finally decided to move anyway.  I decided that if I couldn’t find a job right away, my worst-case scenario was that I would simply get a job at Starbucks.

I repeated those same words over and over again to my friends and family members.

“Oh it’s fine. Worst-case scenario I’ll just get a job at Starbucks.”

(You know where this is going right?)

While it wasn’t an absolutely terrible worst case situation, I manifested it exactly.

After a month or so of applying with no luck, I got a job at Starbucks.

Depending on how you look at it you can view this as an incredible manifestation.  I fully believed that if all else failed, I would just work at Starbucks…which I did for 6 months.

What’s my point?

Planning for worst-case scenarios have the power to actually create the situation you ‘planned’ for.  But do you really want to create a ‘worst case’?

I have learned from that very clear example of my manifestation abilities and no longer plan for those types of situations.

At this stage in my life and business, it means having no Plan B.

There is no ‘worst case scenario’ or alternate plan if my business doesn’t work.  It’s not even a thought in my mind because I know that by planning for it, I am giving my very specific and creative power to something I don’t want.

My plan is to succeed and have my business continue to flourish and thrive.  That’s my plan…all of it.

So, the thoughts of getting a ‘real job’ are no more because that isn’t an option.  The ONLY option is my business and you know why?  It’s because it is what I am meant to do.

Sure it’s risky.  It’s scary at times. It’s a bit outside the box. Hell, it’s unpredictable more often than not and I am still learning a ton about myself and my business as I go.

BUT

It’s also freeing, fantastic, and the best thing I have ever done…aside from moving for love.  Every day I wake up with a purpose.  I love my work. I love my clients. And I love the freedom that this journey provides for me.

Yep, this is my purpose and my heart-centered gift to share with the world and despite what seemingly difficult roadblocks I encounter, succeeding in my business is the only option. No more Plan B or worst-case scenarios for this girl.

Nope, I’m putting my all into my business and by doing that there is no way I can fail.

Your Actionable Item: Today I want you to take a look back over your life to see where you might have planned for the ‘worst-case’.  Did it happen?  Are you planning for one now?  Is it something you want to create?  If not, what DO you want to create?

Do you have a Plan B for if your dreams don’t come true? I want to know your thoughts so share them in the comments below.

And if you have a heart-centered business that you are ready to bring a bit of brilliance to, I have good news for you.  My 90-Days to Biz Brilliance group coaching program is open for registration!  The program officially begins August 7th and I am so excited to finally bring this to life.  I know that your work is important to you and if it is feeling less than brilliant at the moment, it’s time for a change.  Why not get together with other amazing souls going through a similar experience to grow and transform your biz?  This is your chance! If you register by July 21st, you are also going to receive my Invest in Yourself self-study program (valued at $97) before it is even available for sale.  

I want this program to reach as many amazing biz beauties as possible so will you help me by sharing this with your network and tribe?

It’s Time To Come Clean…

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Vortex-ClarityI seem to be in the remedial school of life these days, learning and re-learning lessons that I thought I had mastered long ago (ok well some of them might be a few months old, but who’s counting?).  Last week I was going through a particularly emotional lesson and now I have reached the sunrise or clarity portion of that lesson.

Here’s what I have learned.

  • I have the POWER to create the life and reality of my dreams.  I believe in that so much that I built a business around this exact idea.  In fact it’s not an idea, but instead a truth.  A truth that applies to you too.  YOU have the power to create whatever it is you want.  You just have to decide what you want, hold the intention, and take inspired action.
  • I may not have the skills and connection that others have, but that does not discount my abilities to do the work I love.  I have unique abilities that allow me to connect to and with the exact people I should be connecting with.  Our differences are beautiful and our gifts are unique.  It’s what makes this world amazing.  And being my true authentic self is the best (and truly the only) way to serve my clients.  This article shares my lesson on being the authentic expert.
  • The intuitive guidance that led me to my business was not wrong and it is the same intuitive guidance that I have been discounting for the past few months.  Sure, there are many things I still need to learn, but if something doesn’t sit right with me intuitively, it’s not for me.  I’m ok with that and you should be too.
  • I am surrounded by amazingly talented women who are doing incredible things in the world.  I support them, uplift them, and celebrate their magnificence and I know that their brilliance has no effect on what I am doing or not doing.  Their success doesn’t cause my demise and vice versa.  We are connected. Period.  And the success of one creates a vortex of power for others.
  • When I am in my power, standing in my truth, and sharing who I really am, I have more of an impact on those around me.  This post is a perfect example of how passion, purpose, and authenticity can come together to create an amazing inspirational energy that can’t be denied.
  • I also know that this very moment with all of its lessons is completely perfect.  I am living the life of my dreams and everyday I am closer to more expansion, creation, and success.  The key to all of that is inspired action.  And the inspiration behind the action comes from intuition.  You have it too, so stand in that power and trust your gut to tell you who to hire, what to do, and where to go.
  • Last but not least, I am uncovering more and more of who I really am which is allowing me to reach more women, inspire change, and support the dreams of others.  This life of mine is amazing! Not because of money, numbers, or crazy success.  Not at all.  It’s amazing because I am doing what I love, making a difference, and learning lessons along the way.

Should you find yourself going through lessons you thought you learned, never fear.  A perfect life is not without lessons.   A ‘perfect’ life is the life you are living right now with lessons, love, connection, dreams, and a lot of growth. 

If you are ready to step into your power to create the amazing life or business of your dreams, now is the time to follow your calling.  I have opened up a few spots for my 1-Month Jump Start program for July 2014 that will get you moving in 30 days or less. 4 sessions in 4 weeks = major progress.  This offer expires June 30th so if you want in on this incredibly affordable and powerful opportunity, you can sign up here.

Teacher, Student or Both?

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photo credit: Umang Dutt via photopin cc
photo credit: Umang Dutt via photopin cc

I have come to a point in my journey where I am realizing something that feels pretty big to me.  Something that at one point would have hit me right between the eyes as I thought ‘Huh???’.  In fact what I am realizing is also becoming a theme with many of my professional colleagues and friends who are sharing their gifts with the world.  Maybe you are going through it too on some level and if so, I want you to know you are not alone.

So what is it?

I have recently realized (or remembered as it may be) that we tend to teach the lessons we most need to learn.

Say what?!

If you are a business owner, teacher, professional, or expert of some sort it can be mind-boggling to think that you can actually teach something you still need to learn.

It sounds a bit like an oxymoron, but I am willing to bet that some of the most amazing teachers of the world were also some of the best students.  I mean even Albert Einstein was constantly learning, growing, and evolving in the middle of all his amazing scientific discoveries.

What is it that makes us believe that when we transition into the role of teacher, professional, expert, CEO, or whatever other powerful position you can come up with that, we need to know everything in order to do the job well?

I call BS on that thought because it simply isn’t true.  Not only do we teach what we most need to learn in many cases, but our own individual lessons, growth, and healing make us so great at what we do.  The fact that we have the experience, have the knowledge, know the tools, and can share them with others makes us incredible teachers!

Bottom line: You don’t have to know it all! (Whew, thank goodness for that right?)

So with that thought I share with you my lessons that I am constantly learning and teaching.

  • Flow with life.  Forcing does nothing but create resistance and resistance feels icky.  Don’t struggle, just flow with it! (This is one lesson I have the honor of reminding myself of a lot. )
  • Accept what is. There is no use worrying about the details, the moments that haven’t come yet or trying to prepare for the inevitable failure that we feel is coming.  If you accept what is right in front of you as being perfect in every way you allow solutions, magic, and miracles to appear.  So true!
  • Keep going.  This one seems a bit obvious and while I haven’t ever entertained the thought of ‘quitting’ per se, there are times when I am down in the dumps for whatever reason and instead of planning, scheming, solving, and trying to control the situation, I need to remember to breathe and keep going.  My theme of the year is ‘show up’ and when I consistently show up and remember the first two lessons, things work out rather nicely.
  • Self-care is monumental.  I am learning to listen to my body far more than I have in the past.  A previous people-pleaser and overall achiever, I often felt guilty when I wasn’t busy doing something.  It really didn’t matter what that was either.  Now I am providing myself with more compassion and love so when I feel the need to take a break from Facebook or take a nap to fill up my tank, I do it and don’t feel the least bit guilty (most of the time).

Do you find you learn many of the same lessons that you teach?  I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.  Let’s learn together!

***Calling All Creatives!!! The Free- Creative Chaos call will be this Wed. at 12pm EST so if you are interested and haven’t signed up yet, please do. I will be sending out the call-in info soon and you don’t want to miss this.  If you can’t make the call live, no worries!  I will record it and send it out to everyone that has signed up along with a few exercises to help you get through the web of ideas so you can take inspired action!  unleashvaluepic

Also, don’t forget about the Unleash Your Personal Power e-course that will begin April 1st.  We have now added a payment plan option for those who want to sign up.  It is important for us to make this amazing course as accessible as possible so if you know of anyone who might be interested please don’t hesitate to share.  You already have the power to change your life for the better, we just want to introduce you to it and would love to have you join us for this transformational experience.  ***

 

Be Easy…You’re Still Learning!

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When I was initially inspired to become a life coach, it came at a time when I felt a push to help people do what they really wanted to do, not what they felt they had to do.  In a weird sort of way I was coaching without realizing it and while the different jobs I had that allowed me to talk to people about their “office jobs” or other obligations, I was actually living my purpose, just in a different way.

Since beginning my “official” business (all of a month ago), I have come to realize the coaching piece is what comes naturally to me.  Asking the right questions.  Getting to the core of the issue.  Helping clients take that next step etc. has all been easy, but I am learning a lot about other aspects of running an online business.  And like many of my clients who are just stepping into what they were meant to do, I often find myself getting frustrated or impatient about what I don’t yet know.

I realized today that I am not alone and neither are you.   learning

Not only did I again get a few newsletters delivered right to my inbox with the “how-to” instructions on things I don’t yet know, I also had a chat with a good friend who was going through a similar situation.  (By the way, I highly encourage you to sign up for the free newsletters of your favorite blogs because you can get really great information for free and often in the exact moment you need it.  Keep an eye out because I will have my own newsletter available soon.)

Here’s what I realized:

  • You don’t have to know everything at once in order to begin.  Simply take the tiny steps and follow your inspiration and you will likely find the resources, money, opportunities, connections etc. just come to you right when you need them.  It’s the magic of leading with your inspirational foot.
  • It’s really not fair for you to compare your journey to anyone especially if they have been doing it longer.  They too had to find the answers and figure it out so don’t fret when you find you business Facebook page doesn’t have as many likes as your mentor (ahem, I might be coaching  myself here), or that it is taking a bit longer to find the right publisher for your book.  Keep doing what you love and following your inspiration and you will reap the benefits.
  • This is part of the journey and while we often believe we set goals only to achieve them, the journey should be fun.  If it’s not what’s the point.  So stop worrying and find the joy in learning, growing, and evolving into the new, happier, dream-livin’ YOU!
  • Last but not least, you don’t have to do it alone.  There are coaches, guides, mentors, and ample resources out there for you to access.  We live in a time where all the information we want is accessible to us, so use it.  You don’t have to reinvent the wheel to get to where you want to be.  Let’s come together in community and help each other out.  Together we can do more anyway right?

Be easy with yourself and enjoy the process of learning your craft whatever that may be.  And if there are things that really take the joy out of your journey, pay someone else to do it if you can.  Don’t allow a little accounting, website snafu, or other frustration get the best of you.  There are people in the world following their dreams doing the exact thing you don’t enjoy, so why not let them?

And remember, you don’t have to know it all, be it all, and do it all this very moment, so take a break and give yourself a break!

Do you want to see how I can help you find the resources, money, opportunities, and connections to make your dreams a reality?  Contact me to set up a FREE coaching call, I would love to give you a bit of guidance.