Lamisha Serf-Walls

Making Peace With Your Starting Point

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peace

Have you ever had the experience of being in a situation, job, relationship, or circumstance that you simply wanted to get out of?  Maybe you wanted it to move in another direction or you wanted to have a different outcome.  Simply put, you were in one place, but you desperately wanted to be in another without knowing how to get there.

I think we all have had that experience.  I know I have had that many times especially when it came to my job.  At one point (not too long ago) I was working for a company that was ok, but I couldn’t get over how demeaning, mean, and completely unfair my boss was.  My daily focus was how much I wanted to leave that place and yet no matter how many resumes I sent out I couldn’t seem to land another job.  At one point my focus for what I wanted next was so diminished I would have taken anything just to leave the toxic environment I was working in.  Unfortunately I couldn’t just quit with nothing else lined up so I stayed.

I was on the job hunt for over a year all the while I woke up each morning with anxiety and dread as I made my way into work.  I couldn’t get over how uncomfortable the place was.  Then one day something happened.  I stopped looking for another job.  I don’t know if it was out of pure frustration or because I had accepted my fate, but I stopped.  I decided to find something to do in addition to my work there that would make me happy.

That thing was writing.

I began writing greeting cards and dabbled with some freelance work that I have continued 3 years later and I am so happy I did.  Not only was I more inspired to write, but I had somehow made peace with where I was.  Not too long after that point my horrific boss (though she was nice as a person) left the company.

Poof! One day she was gone.  I thought that was the absolute best thing that could happen, but it gets better.

A few months later I received a call from a former co-worker with a potential job offer.  A job I hadn’t even been looking for!  A job that turned out to be more money than I was making and would allow me to work from home.  I had always toyed with the idea of working from home, but I had no idea how that would be possible.  Not only that, but it turned out to be the perfect scenario since my partner and I knew we would be moving in the next few months out-of-state.  I knew if I didn’t have a job lined up I would have to stay behind to keep my job and now I didn’t have to do that at all.  My job moved with me!

It turned out to be the perfect situation and in it I learned a very valuable lesson.

When you make peace with your starting point, the Universe can work on your behalf to bring things to you that will move you toward your heart’s desire no matter how big it seems. 

The moral of this story is this…

Stop struggling with where you are now for it is just your starting point.  Make peace with it and find some way to appreciate and enjoy where you are now.  When you do, you will be amazed at the opportunities that unfold before your very eyes.  Opportunities you may never have thought possible.

Using The “What If” Game To Increase Positivity

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I will be the first to tell you I am not as positive as I would like to be all the time.  In fact, there are days when I feel down and I long to find my way back to the light airy feel of a positive disposition and when positivity quotes and pep talks fail, I play the “What If” game.  You probably have never heard of it as it is something I sort of created as I was trying desperately to get back to a place of feeling good.  You know how it goes…you attract how you feel (or for those familiar with the Law of Attraction, you get what you vibrate).  I didn’t like how I was feeling, thinking, and the overall icky feeling a negative mood can bring, so I started day dreaming…and that is when the “What If” game was born.

Here’s how it works:

Whenever you are feeling particularly negative about a certain situation, circumstance, or person you start by using your creativity and imagination to ask yourself various questions starting with “what if”, only they are framed in a positive light.

For instance, if the worry is about having enough money you might ask yourself “What if I had all I needed?” “What if all of my debt were paid off and every dollar I earned was simply disposable income?”, “What if I had a job that paid exactly the dollar figure I know I am worth?” Can you see how that might feel?  Where does your mind go when you think of that?  Do you imagine all the things you would buy with that money?  Can you feel the relaxation or elation you might feel if that were true?  This isn’t necessarily about believing that is happening, it is simply experiencing the feeling as if it has happened.  Will it magically put money into your bank account?  Probably not right this second, but it will turn your mood around so you are in a better place to relax and allow money, opportunities, and other resources to flow to you and through you.

Another example might be surrounding a close relationship.  “What if my partner gave me all the love and affection I desire?”, “What if I found my soul mate tomorrow?”, “What if my partner surprised me with a romantic dinner and flowers?”  How does that feel?  Are you giddy?  Have butterflies in your tummy?  Are you smiling from ear to ear, floating on cloud 9 just imagining your partner?  Viewing your partner in a positive light even in the midst of a challenging situation can shift not only your mood, but the entire dynamic of the situation.

You get the point.

The idea is to ask yourself these questions in such a way that you use your imagination to see these things happening and then feel the effect of the thought itself.  Do you remember as a child imagining something you were really looking forward to no matter how far out it seemed?  Or maybe you were imagining what it would be like go to Disney World or fly your own airplane or sing on stage?  Do you remember the magic you felt as you thought about these things not because they were happening, but simply because you were thinking about them with all the details, people, sounds, and events included?

It seems that somewhere between childhood and adulthood we have lost our ability to imagine and dream of far away things just because we can.  We have lost the ability to reap the benefits of positive excitement by imagining the never-ending “what if’s” that produce that good feeling that most children carry with them at all times.

It doesn’t really matter where we lost it or how, what matters is that you can enjoy that feeling again.  Try it.  The next time you are feeling particularly negative, play the “what if” game and see if it doesn’t move you into a more negative frame of mind.  Or better yet, play it once a day to give yourself a positive boost and see how it affects your life.