Lamisha Serf-Walls

The When/Then Manifesting Pitfall

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manifest

When you think of your happiness and what it takes for you to live a happy life, do you find that you mostly feel that way in the present?

Or, do you find yourself falling into what I call the When/Then Manifesting Pitfall.

We all know that when we want to create or manifest a specific thing (be it a career, money, a relationship etc.) it is because we think it will make us feel good.  We search for happiness and want certain things in our lives to feel fulfilled, worthy, and blissful.  But when we are in the process of creating or manifesting those things, we often find ourselves feeling antsy, uncomfortable, and impatient.

We might look around asking “Well where is it?”. 

And if you are like me you might be saying…“When I have the money/car/relationship/career/body I want…THEN I’ll be happy/grateful/fulfilled etc.”

Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.

When you are in manifesting mode, you have to first know that it is coming and enjoy the process.

I have one too many times fallen into the habit of taking score of what I want and how long it takes to get here.  All the while I am missing all of the amazing things around me.  At times in my life I have been a conditional happy person, meaning under certain conditions I would be happy.  (Mostly when things were going really well.)

Falling into the When/Then Pitfall is so easy in our world.  We are constantly on the look out for the next thing to bring about joy that we miss the very thing in front of us that could make us happy now.  And the crazy thing is that in order to manifest what you want, you have to be happy first.

What the career of your dreams? Make peace with the job you have.

What more money? Be grateful for the money you have and enjoy where you are.

What a better relationship? Appreciate the positive aspects your partner brings to the table and simply be happy.

The best thing you can do when you are trying to manifest anything, is start by focusing on what brings you joy in all aspects of your life. 

Find your joy with the in-between time.  As the details are coming together and you haven’t yet reached the ultimate manifestation, know that it is coming and choose joy, happiness, and bliss now.  After all life is to be lived and enjoyed in the present as opposed to some arbitrary moment in the future.

Life is meant to be loved, enjoyed, and appreciated in the moment…always.  Don’t wait for the future to live the life of your dreams…start now with the little moments.

Your action step for the day is to be mindful of all the joy, happiness, and blissful moments you have right in front of you.  Notice them, appreciate them, and welcome them with open arms.  When you do that, I guarantee all those things you have been wanting to manifest will come that much quicker. 🙂

Re-Framing the Green-Eyed Monster

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envy

When we are growing into our dreams and taking action in the world to create the life of our dreams, there are times (sometimes many) when we come up against the dreaded green-eyed monster.  We see all these amazing people doing what we want to do and doing it WELL.

Some of us get discouraged and begin to feel ‘less-than’ that other person that is doing it better, faster, and more beautifully than us.  Others feel like giving up because they convince themselves that they won’t ever measure up.

Well I have a re-frame that will turn that green-eyed monster into a joyous, happy, and celebratory friend.

Check out the video below to find out how you can use this re-frame the next time you feel a bit of envy, jealousy, or ‘less-than’ someone else.

 

P.S. If you are interested in some FREE coaching hop on over to my Facebook Coaching Power Hour that I am hosting TONIGHT from 8pm-9pm EST.  I will have a special thread open for your questions and will be offering my insight and coaching for an hour.  Got a burning question about creating the life &/or biz of your dreams? Ask away!  All you have to do is be a fan of my FB page and come with your questions. 🙂 Talk to you tonight!

Recent Lessons & Major Breakthroughs

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Let your light shine!
Let your light shine!

Being a coach, I am not exempt from life lessons and major breakthroughs that I help my clients through and this past week has been a pretty big week for me.  Not only am I stepping more into who I really am as a business owner and coach, but also who I am as a wife, a mother, and all the other shoes I fill.  It’s both liberating and sometimes downright scary to look at all the things I am doing in my life and where I want to be.  I stand in awe as I look how far I have come and am amazed at the progress while still looking ahead to everything that I want to do.

I wanted to take a moment to share with you my recent life lessons and ‘aha’ moments that have come from my conversations with clients and my dear spiritual soul sisters who have shared their amazing gifts with me.  I hope that by reading this you are able to identify with some (if not all) of the lessons and feel your own transformation and healing begin to take place.

  • Have Fun: This is such a good reminder not just for me but for any of you wonderful business-minded souls who are working, striving, and making moves in the business world.  We are too often caught in the building phase of our empire that we forget what it’s like to truly LIVE and have FUN!  In fact, I was given the assignment to do something fun every single day and I had a hard time thinking of what I would do!  How silly is that?!  Fun is a huge piece of the happy life puzzle and it is what opens us to the magic that is in the world.  So, I ask you: What have you done for fun lately?

 

  • Recognize and Celebrate Your Own Brilliance: As a coach, I am able to immediately see the light and brilliance that my clients have.  I see it, connect with it, and reflect it back to them in ways that they can see and feel it.  It can be far more difficult for me to stand back and view myself in that same way which at times results in doubt, frustration, and dare I say fear? A wonderfully talented soul sister of mine reminded me that I don’t have to compare my talents and gifts with any one else nor do I have to place anyone on a pedestal while viewing myself as ‘below’ them on the totem pole of power and authority.  When we are stepping onto our true path, it can be far too easy to compare ourselves with those around us.  We take note of their success and all that they have conquered while tallying up our ‘successes’ that never seem to amount to much. But when we can step back from our ego and view our life, our accomplishments, and our gifts through fresh eyes, we see that comparison is not necessary.  We are all brilliant in our own way and simply knowing that is the first step to truly seeing it.  I want you to know that you are brilliant as well!  Whether you are an artist, coach, healer, yoga instructor, or you are an amazing parent, partner, animal-lover etc.  YOU are brilliant and have a light and many amazing gifts that the world needs.  See it! Embrace it! Celebrate it! 🙂

 

  • Take Risks: This one is a HUGE message I have been getting in the last few weeks but I only recognized it last week.  Most of my life I have had this internal fight inside of myself.  Logic vs Dreams, Stability vs Freedom, Comfort vs Adventure.  I haven’t ever really been the risk-taker in life and have spent much of my life taking calculated risks while worrying about the best decision to make to keep things ‘stable’.  Since I started my business I have been playing it safe too which translates to playing small.  I have put my toe in the water of uncertainty and slowly eased in when what my heart really wants to do (and what my soul is aching to do) is dive in clothes and all!  I have been in my own way and while it may not seem like that on the outside, there are many ways it is manifesting in my life.  Procrastination, timidness, fear, and more uncertainty.  But here is the flip side of all that.  I KNOW that in order for me to be wildly successful and do all the work I am truly meant to do, I must stop with the fear, stop with the calculated risks and listen to my heart again.  The same heart that told me to leap into my business.  The same heart that said, I don’t know how but I will figure it out.  The same heart that at one point told me to move over 300 miles away from my home, my friends, and my family for love.  THAT is the heart I am listening to.  So risks I shall take and I encourage you to do the same.  So what if you don’t have all your ducks in a row, some ducks may show up to the party fashionably late, but that doesn’t stop the party.  Jump! Leap! Dive in and watch what happens to your life!

 

  • Ask For Help: I don’t know if this is because I am the oldest child or if I have developed a sense of ‘I can do it all myself’ syndrome, but somewhere along the way I decided I didn’t need help.  Not only that, but even if I did, I wouldn’t ask for it. And I am not exactly talking about asking my fellow neighbors and friends for help, I’m talking asking the Universe and the Divine for assistance.  I am a firm believer that part of what makes our amazing lives so great is the amount of support we receive from other realms.  Call it Heaven, God, Goddess, Angels, the Universe, or whatever it is you believe in, but I know that we are not meant to travel along our paths alone and yet there are times I don’t ask for help. So, I am getting back to my daily connection with Spirit (both mine and the Universal Spirit of all things) through meditation and prayer to bring that wonderfully supportive energy back into my life and business.  We don’t have to do everything on our own, nor do we have to know how, who, what, when, and all the extra details that go with it.  We can simply ask and be open to receive the answer.  It’s that simple! So, what could you use a little help with that you have been doing all on your own?  Ask, and you shall receive!

I hope that my recent breakthroughs and life lessons resonate with you and open your eyes to your very own blissful breakthroughs.  The more I grow, learn, and evolve, the more I realize life is a series of lessons that further uncover our greatness, beauty, and purpose.

May you have a bit of fun, recognize your own brilliance and light, take a few risks, dream big, and ask for help from the amazing and always loving Universe today and always.  Things are changing and life is too good to stay in one place and play small.  Reach beyond your comfort zone daily and expand into every corner of your greatness and watch as your life transforms into the most amazing ride you never thought possible.

Sending you lots of love,

Lamisha

The Love Rant

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love

It’s not Valentines Day or Sweetest Day, however love is on my mind.

Why?

Because I just got married, like yesterday.

And while I am very much the romantic, swooning, wear my heart on my sleeve kind of gal, I enjoy love in all forms, not just the romantic kind.

I have said this before and I am going to say it again so bear with me while I go on a little love rant.

I have lived the life of just getting by in my work.  Doing a good job, but not really loving what I do.  While it was manageable for several years, I knew there was something bigger and more soul-satisfying out there for me.  When I found coaching, I knew.  Now that I am living my dream, doing work I absolutely freakin’ LOVE, I can’t imagine doing anything else.  Life is amazing. Truly.

I have also lived the life of doing things that others expect of me.  Fitting into a mold, life, and expectation of the world and not allowing myself to take care of my own needs and do more things I love.  Simple things like reading, writing, and spending time in the sun.  Things like taking vacations, going to yoga, or taking a nap when I feel like it.  Now that I am giving myself permission to do more of what I LOVE, life is a lot better.  I’m healthier, happier, and find myself enjoying each moment far more than I have in the past.

The next thing on my love list is kind of a big one.  I have lived the life of judgement.  Judgement of others (which I am certainly not proud of).  Jealousy for what I felt I was missing in my life and a general lack of love for others.  Now don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t a mean person per se, and I didn’t feel this way about all people, but what I realized was my outward judgement for others was really an inward judgement of myself.  I wanted a life that I felt I didn’t have and didn’t have the ability to create for myself.  All that has changed.  I have realized that not only are we all connected, but that love is the most important thing that connects us all.  Instead of comparing where I am and judging myself for not being as far as someone else, I try to remember we are all on our own journey and in celebrating the success of another, I am able to see them as an example of where I can be.

So what is this little love rant all about?  It’s about infusing your life, every part of your life with a little bit more love.  Everything from showing yourself some extra love and care to doing kind things for others.  Allow your soul to sing by doing more of what you love.  Share your gifts with the world.  Smile at strangers and make their day.  Love yourself and each other and by golly if you are spending 40+ hours a week struggling through a job that ‘just isn’t that bad’, take some time to explore what you truly want to do.  Now is the time to do it!

I’ve said it before and this isn’t likely to be the last time (in case you were wondering).  You deserve to do what you love, to have more fun, and live a joyful, amazing, and abundant life.  You don’t have to only pick one thing to make you happy and let the rest go.  YOU have the ability to create an amazing life and but you have to first make the decision to do so.  So what are you waiting for?

Are you ready to take the first step to creating and living the life of your dreams?  Let’s chat about your biggest, boldest, most amazing dreams you have processing. I am opening up several new client consultations for anyone who might be interested now through the end of April, so contact me ASAP to grab your spot.  I am also launching a wonderful group coaching opportunity for those of you that might not be ready for full-on individual coaching.  Sign-up for my VIP list so you don’t miss the special launch info and additional gift for the first 5 sign-ups.