Lamisha Serf-Walls

Do you want to be truly happy? Do this!

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photo credit: Rain Faces via photopin (license)

For far too many people ‘happiness’ is an ever-elusive future possibility.

With more money, love, success, adventure, ____(fill in the blank) we think we will have more joy and happiness in our lives, but I don’t believe that to be true.

What I now know, from many years of going against the grain of my own soul is that happiness is not only an inside job, but it requires a few key components…none of which you have to wait for.

You want to be truly happy?  Follow these simple steps.

  • Speak your truth.  Stop allowing others to stifle your essence as they tell you who to be and how to act.  Lean into your natural flow of living, breathing, and being and give yourself permission to speak your truth.  Know what you want out of life and go get it, unapologetically.  Stop following the herd and doing all the things everyone else is doing because you think you’re supposed to.  Find your truth and then live it, every.single.day.
  • Find your flow. I talk about this all the time with my clients and it’s SO important when it comes to being happy.  Finding your flow is all about leaning into what works for you.  Stepping into the path that while it might be a challenge is exciting, invigorating, and inspires you.  It’s about finding what you do naturally instead of following all the ‘traditional’ how-to guides.  Oh and one more thing…stop judging yourself for NOT ‘fitting in’ with the status quo.  You weren’t meant to fit in my dear…you were meant to find what works for you and do it beautifully.
  • Know what you want…then go get it.  Sounds simple enough right?  Unfortunately there are far too many people not willing to be honest with themselves about what it is they truly want out of life.  Speak it into reality.  Know it. Own it. Live it. Love it. And while you are at it…love YOURSELF.  

Without these 3 things, happiness will always feel just outside your reach.  The reality is that only YOU have the power to make yourself happy.  Don’t play victim to your circumstance any longer and allow yourself to be FREE knowing that you deserve to think, feel, and experience happiness every day.

And one more thing….

If the steps above feel a bit too difficult or you are rolling your eyes say ‘yeah right, that’s all you have to do!?’, hit the button below and let’s chat.

Your happiness is priceless and you shouldn’t be spending another minute living in uncertainty wondering when and if you will ever be happy.  Helping clients find it within themselves is my specialty, so let’s talk.

 

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LOA Tip: Let It Go!

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Over the past 2 weeks I have been doing something that I teach my clients NOT to do when manifesting their desires.  And while I’m not quite sure why this is coming up right now, I did receive the message that it is time for this to change NOW.

Check out the video below to learn how to detach and let go of the thing(s) you are trying to manifest so you can avoid the incessant thoughts like “Dude where’s my stuff???”

For more manifesting tips check out this post.

When Life Happens…Just Flow With It

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No matter what you are doing or how great things are, life happens and during those moments of chaos when we sometimes feel the need to fight the current and get back to the balance we are used to, it’s usually best to just flow with it.

I thought I would share a bit about my current chaos and how I am handling it. 🙂

 

P.S. Don’t forget about the Epic Birthday Giveaway!  You officially have a week to register to win 1 of 13 amazing gifts.  Hop on over to this post check it out. Good luck!

 

 

 

Teacher, Student or Both?

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photo credit: Umang Dutt via photopin cc
photo credit: Umang Dutt via photopin cc

I have come to a point in my journey where I am realizing something that feels pretty big to me.  Something that at one point would have hit me right between the eyes as I thought ‘Huh???’.  In fact what I am realizing is also becoming a theme with many of my professional colleagues and friends who are sharing their gifts with the world.  Maybe you are going through it too on some level and if so, I want you to know you are not alone.

So what is it?

I have recently realized (or remembered as it may be) that we tend to teach the lessons we most need to learn.

Say what?!

If you are a business owner, teacher, professional, or expert of some sort it can be mind-boggling to think that you can actually teach something you still need to learn.

It sounds a bit like an oxymoron, but I am willing to bet that some of the most amazing teachers of the world were also some of the best students.  I mean even Albert Einstein was constantly learning, growing, and evolving in the middle of all his amazing scientific discoveries.

What is it that makes us believe that when we transition into the role of teacher, professional, expert, CEO, or whatever other powerful position you can come up with that, we need to know everything in order to do the job well?

I call BS on that thought because it simply isn’t true.  Not only do we teach what we most need to learn in many cases, but our own individual lessons, growth, and healing make us so great at what we do.  The fact that we have the experience, have the knowledge, know the tools, and can share them with others makes us incredible teachers!

Bottom line: You don’t have to know it all! (Whew, thank goodness for that right?)

So with that thought I share with you my lessons that I am constantly learning and teaching.

  • Flow with life.  Forcing does nothing but create resistance and resistance feels icky.  Don’t struggle, just flow with it! (This is one lesson I have the honor of reminding myself of a lot. )
  • Accept what is. There is no use worrying about the details, the moments that haven’t come yet or trying to prepare for the inevitable failure that we feel is coming.  If you accept what is right in front of you as being perfect in every way you allow solutions, magic, and miracles to appear.  So true!
  • Keep going.  This one seems a bit obvious and while I haven’t ever entertained the thought of ‘quitting’ per se, there are times when I am down in the dumps for whatever reason and instead of planning, scheming, solving, and trying to control the situation, I need to remember to breathe and keep going.  My theme of the year is ‘show up’ and when I consistently show up and remember the first two lessons, things work out rather nicely.
  • Self-care is monumental.  I am learning to listen to my body far more than I have in the past.  A previous people-pleaser and overall achiever, I often felt guilty when I wasn’t busy doing something.  It really didn’t matter what that was either.  Now I am providing myself with more compassion and love so when I feel the need to take a break from Facebook or take a nap to fill up my tank, I do it and don’t feel the least bit guilty (most of the time).

Do you find you learn many of the same lessons that you teach?  I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.  Let’s learn together!

***Calling All Creatives!!! The Free- Creative Chaos call will be this Wed. at 12pm EST so if you are interested and haven’t signed up yet, please do. I will be sending out the call-in info soon and you don’t want to miss this.  If you can’t make the call live, no worries!  I will record it and send it out to everyone that has signed up along with a few exercises to help you get through the web of ideas so you can take inspired action!  unleashvaluepic

Also, don’t forget about the Unleash Your Personal Power e-course that will begin April 1st.  We have now added a payment plan option for those who want to sign up.  It is important for us to make this amazing course as accessible as possible so if you know of anyone who might be interested please don’t hesitate to share.  You already have the power to change your life for the better, we just want to introduce you to it and would love to have you join us for this transformational experience.  ***

 

Why “Trying Harder” isn’t the Answer

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I cringe every time I hear the words “try harder”.  For some reason it sends the message that you just aren’t doing enough to make it (whatever it seems to be at the moment) happen.  It also suggests that if you are giving your all, it just isn’t enough.

Ick!  Just writing that makes me cringe.

I am not the kind of coach that is going to tell you to push through the pain and “try harder”.  I won’t tell you to power through or work harder at whatever you are doing. 

Why?

Because honestly, I care more than that and I don’t believe our dreams come true with blood, sweat, and tears (at least it doesn’t have to be that way).

I believe in a better way.

When clients come to me and say they are feeling stuck or in a standstill with the progression of their dreams, I try to tap into what they mean by “stuck”.  Are they stuck on ideas, actions, motivation, clients, or forward movement?  Do they need logistical assistance or is it an internal block we need to address?

Understanding where the glitch lies is paramount in helping them work through it.  Unlike how some sports coaches might tell players to work through the pain and “power through”, I just don’t believe in telling someone to “try harder”. 

I like to actually suggest the opposite.

Instead of pushing and fighting for the next step, what if you were able to take a step back and simple allow it to come to you?  What if you could relax, regroup, and trust that you don’t have to fight, claw, and force the answers to come.  What if right here, right now, you didn’t have to do anything?  What if they could simply flow….

In our society that is a big what if because we aren’t taught that growing up.  In school we are taught that if our grades aren’t high enough or if we aren’t doing well enough in a particular area, then we must try harder.  But what happens when we are giving our all and we still feel blocked?  What then?

Sometimes trying too hard pushes the thing we want to achieve, further away.  By forcing it and trying desperately to make it work, we cut off the flow of inspiration and energy.  We allow the frustration to settle in and when that happens, the fight gets harder.

Take writer’s block for instance.  For those of you who have ever experienced the Achilles heal of writing, you know the harder you try to force your words to flow, the harder it gets.  But, when you are able to step away, change your focus, get some fresh air, and then come back to it, it seems as if the clouds part and the heavenly writing angels sing.  Your thoughts turn into beautiful words that when weaved together create a tapestry of creative-awesomeness. flow

I believe the sweet spot for your dreams to become reality is in your inspiration.  When it feels hard, sticky, frustrating, or like your progress has reached a plateau, the answer is not to try harder. 

The answer lies in letting go of the reins and creating the space for your next step to appear.

How do you do that?  Here are a few things that I find helpful. 

  • Change your focus to something else. 
  • Sing, dance, or listen to music. 
  • Read a good book, go for a run, or do some yoga. 
  • Meditate, have coffee with your friends, or write in your journal. 
  • Laugh, smile, or do something nice for someone else. 
  • Take a hot shower, get a massage, or go for a walk.
  • Enjoy some time in nature, breathe deeply, and remember that all is working out for you.
  • Remember you don’t have to have it all done right this moment, but trust that you will have it done.
  • Enjoy the journey.  It’s so easy to get caught up in the decisions, steps, and plans we have in life, but in the grand scheme of things, the juice is in the journey.  Enjoy it!

You may find that your sticking points are scattered along your path as things grow and evolve, but if you can remember to flow instead of forcing the next step to come, you will not only soon be celebrating your dreams becoming reality, but will also find that you had fun along the way!