Lamisha Serf-Walls

Inspiration From Monsters and Cavemen…Who Knew?!

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Generally my family and I implement “family movie night” at least once a week as a way to relax and regroup after a long week.  This week we had a bit of a movie marathon and watched Monster University and The Croods, both of which I highly recommend (especially if you have children).  For the most part, family movie night is a chance to get away from whatever may be on my mind from the week before, yet there are times when the movies hit a chord within me so strongly that it sends my mind into a flutter of inspiration.

This Saturday was one of those nights.

Inspiration #1

While watching Monster University I was inspired by the message that we can each use our unique gifts and perspectives to do similar work and it is our unique experiences that make that work not only different, but amazing.

What does that really mean?

Regardless of how many people we feel are doing exactly the same thing that we want to do (only in our mind much better), we each bring our own set of talents, gifts, and experiences to the table.  No one else is better or worse than us, they are just different and different is ok.  In fact, it’s better than ok, it’s great!  Different means we can extend our reach to a group of people others can’t reach simply because of who we are.

This comes up a lot with my clients.  So many people, (myself included) view what other people are doing in the same genre as ourselves as doing it bigger and better that we find ourselves comparing apples to oranges.  Sure you can have two writers who have a similar style, but the truth is each is unique and amazing in their own way.  The same goes for two business owners, coaches, stylists, or whatever your dream might entail. Don’t let the success of another put a damper on your amazing gift.

YOU have a gift that can reach people that the other person can’t, so stand in your power and celebrate the wonderful things you bring to the table!

So the next time you start questioning your dream because you feel like you couldn’t possibly live up to someone you believe is doing it better, remember the little lesson from Monster University.  Better yet, watch the movie and see if you experience the same inspiration I did.

Inspiration #2

I expected the next movie to be more entertaining than insightful, but I couldn’t help but notice some interesting themes.

The first theme is one I have heard and dealt with several times in my lifetime.  Fear of the unknown.  When we fear what we do not know and allow it to stop us from stepping outside of our comfort zone, we become caged birds (or in this case caged cavemen).  We become too fearful of taking risks that we don’t really live and experience the precious gift of life.

One quote that stood out to me came from the teenage daughter as she was talking about her dad’s philosophy on staying safe:

“That wasn’t living!  That was just…not dying!  There’s a difference!”

How many of us have lived in this way before?  Merely surviving a life that may be uncomfortable and not all that great, but too fearful of what could go wrong in the future to take that step to do something bigger.

Surviving isn’t thriving.  Living a life with your dreams tucked down in your soul never to see the light of day isn’t living life to it’s fullest and I assure you it is not what you were given this precious time to do.

You were meant to love life, explore, and experience it.  Feel it, devour the juicy tidbits of amazingness.  To identify your gifts and share them with the world.  You were meant to be happy!  So if you aren’t happy right now, is it because you are fearful of stepping outside your comfort zone?  Fearful that the next thing might be worse than now?

What if it isn’t?  What if it is bigger, better, and more amazing than you ever dreamed?  Would one single, scarey step be worth it?

Another theme that came up was the idea of “following the light to tomorrow”.  Essentially it means to just keep going.Light

When things get tough as they sometimes do, remembering your dreams and why you started to begin with can help you just keep going.  Continue moving forward toward the light of tomorrow with your dreams alive and you can do anything.  Just keep going.

So, if you aren’t living the life of your dreams and you are too worried about others doing something better than you, are you ready to take the step to move forward?  Ready to live your gifts and share them with the world? Ready to do more that just merely survive?

If so, contact me to find out more information on getting ready to make 2014 the best year yet!  I want to offer you a chance to get a head start on your dreams and to make some big things happen next year.  If you are ready, I have a special treat for you!!! Send me an email today to find out more information on your FREE session and if you choose to work with me after our free session and get started this month, I am offering packages at a discounted rate (to go along with my gratitude and giving theme).  You don’t want to miss this!!!

November Theme: Gratitude & Giving

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Happy Friday you Darling Dreamers!

It’s the end of another week and the start of a new month!  I can’t believe in 2 months we will be moving into yet another year of wonderful goodness.  Can you feel the energy speeding up with the holidays quickly approaching?  I sure can!

I have been thinking about 2014 a lot over the last few weeks.  While each year feels like an opportunity to start anew, 2014 seems even more like a clean slate.  Maybe it has to do with my current job coming to an end and the options for the future still to be determined.

Every year around this time, I get excited for the newness and a fresh opportunity to make huge strides in my life and to make it an even better year than the one before.  I tend to do a bit of reflection on the past year to identify the growth, evolution, and lessons learned as well as figure out what I still want to work on.  Then, I might sit down to write a letter to myself for the year ahead or create a vision board of what I want to achieve (depending on how I am feeling).

Do you do any type of reflection before you set your intentions for the coming year?  I asked around to some of my friends and many of them said they haven’t even begun to think of what they want in 2014.  Have you?

If you haven’t, I encourage you to take some time to do just that.  Ask yourself the following questions:

What did I accomplish in 2013?

What lessons did I learn?

What didn’t I accomplish that I wanted to?

What was holding me back?

That last question is a big one and it may not be something you can readily identify.  Many people would answer that with a simple word : Life.

When it comes to resolutions, intentions, goals, and big dreams there are a number of things that can hold a person back.  Maybe you are fearful of failure (who isn’t?).  Maybe you have a fear of the unknown.  Some people fear success.  Others say that lack of motivation, inspiration, and a plan to do what they love is the issue.  Maybe it’s time, resources, money, connections, confidence, that is keeping you where you are.  Or maybe you have no clue what it is.

Identifying what has held you back from achieving your deepest desires is a step in the right direction.  Knowledge is power, so knowing what it is is half the battle.  The other half is knowing what to do to get through it.

As we move swiftly into the November and the holiday season, I encourage you to take some time to reflect on 2013 so far.  Don’t just identify the marks you missed, but make sure to identify the things you did well.  The good, great, and amazing moments of 2013 should be celebrated!

With that said, I wanted to let you know that I have created a theme for November and that theme is Gratitude & Giving.  With the holiday season upon us and a new year just around the corner, I wanted to extend some amazing (and FREE) opportunities/gifts for you lovely readers.  While I am planning for 2014 to be an incredible-blow-my-mind-adventure, I also want to place my focus on the abundance and beauty that is in my life in this very moment.

So, for your first gift, you can download your copy of my article : 20 Ways To Keep Your Dream Alive!  All you have to do is sign up for my newsletter and I promise NOT to send you unnecessary, boring, emails just to send them.  This list is truly my VIP list, so you are going to want to take full advantage of the awesome gifts that are coming this month.

I hope you have a magnificent weekend and as always, thanks for reading!

Love

From Faith To Fear And Back Again

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I know I typically begin the week with either my Inspiration Round-up or Dreamer Highlight, but in light of keeping it real with you lovely readers, I decided to start the week this post instead.  It is something I have been dealing with in the past few weeks and I am sure many of you have (or will) go through it as well.

I spent most of June and July imagining, envisioning, and creating my coaching framework as well as figuring out how I would present the information to potential clients.  The process was very easy-going and high-flying as everything was so exciting.  I didn’t feel a sense of urgency to get things completed by a certain date because I was simply following my inspiration to the very next step.  I had this intuitive knowing that August 1st would be when I open practice up to take new clients.  I had an idea that once I did, clients would come to me and would immediately want to get started.  I even went so far as to set a goal for how many new clients I wanted to book by the end of the month.

We are halfway through the month and I am not anywhere near my goal.  Fear

Bummer.

Actually it hit me much harder than just a “bummer” moment.  In fact, I have found myself deep in the throes of doubtful thinking, fear, and disbelief. My self-talk was running rampant as I condescendingly asked myself “How could you actually believe it would take off so easily?”

This was an admittedly ugly place to be for sure.

As I began moving through the muck of self-doubt, I realized I had allowed fear to take the place of the light, easy-going faith I had as I created my coaching model seemingly effortlessly.  Through that process I kept reassuring myself (read my Ego) that I didn’t have to have it mapped out as to how, when, and who would want to work with me.  I just knew that as long as I do what I love and stay true to myself the people who are meant to work with me will.

While I might have doubted how quickly I would book clients, I never once questioned that life coaching is what I am meant to do.

This weekend I did some thinking about my client goal for this month and couldn’t help but wonder if I had made a mistake by having a number I wanted to hit for the month.  Instead of focusing on writing blog posts, working with my current awesome clients, and creating resources for my readers, I found myself keeping score of how many clients I had (or didn’t have).  And while we are taught in the traditional/logical business world to set goals, map out a plan, and execute, I am beginning to see that might not be the best tactic for me.  My philosophy does center around following my inspiration and the general goal setting is not all that inspirational for me.

So, I am happy to say I have moved through the muck and am moving back into trusting this process.  I honestly believe and know that if you do what you love, the rest will fall into place, so that is exactly what I plan on doing.

In the past two weeks I have moved from a place of faith in the process to fear and back again and I must say it feels so much better.

Do I think I will always be high-flying and trust the process?  Probably not, but I now know it is not where I have to stay.  I can allow my Ego to have her say before I kindly tell her to relax and trust the process.  And what is even better than that?  I can use my personal experience to help my clients who may be struggling with the same thing.

Where do you have doubts in your life?  I am interested to know how you deal with your own doubts, please feel free to share below!

 

Fearless Living…The “How”

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Let me first apologize to you lovely readers for taking so long to continue my thoughts from last weeks “fear” theme.  Sometimes the things we plan are not the things we must do in the moment and I am learning that more and more each day.  With that said, I am back and I am excited to update you on some recent developments in my world.

I ended last weeks post with a promise as to how I was going to begin living a fearless life as a way to teach my son (and future children) to do the same.  At the time my thoughts were on taking some much-needed action toward my goals and leaving fear in the dust.  Before I do that, let me give you a little insight into why I haven’t been moving forward as much as I would have liked.

I have talked a little bit about my plans to write a children’s book and I set the intention to begin writing on a certain date.  I thought the best way to do it was to jump right in, but I soon realized (after scheduling conflicts) that maybe I should wait until I have more inspiration before I begin writing.  I still stand by that decision, but the more I found myself waiting for the inspiration to hit me, I realized I was also allowing fear to dictate my plans.

I had a moment (or two) where I thought if I don’t start this book, I can’t fail.  But then again if I don’t start it, I can’t succeed either.  So, in order to accomplish my dream of writing a book, I have to write, but in order to write the best book, I have to be inspired.  To be completely honest with you fear was not only dictating my plans for writing a children’s book, but also my plans on starting my business and many of my other dreams.  Looking back, I can see my vision was a bit skewed.  I thought I needed certain pieces to fall into place in order to execute my plan of action.  I realize what that really was, was fear.

I was procrastinating and in a way sabotaging my dreams by not even getting started.  I did a lot of good talking about my dreams, about my plans, about the many things that had to happen first, and then I could start working on my dreams only to find they were excuses.  Excuses not to start for fear of failure.  Excuses not to begin for fear of not being good enough.  Excuses not to dream bigger, for fear my reality wouldn’t live up to the picture in my head.  And when I jumped off the boat of self-pity and self-sabotage, I remembered this…

The best part of our dreams is the journey we take in reaching them.  The mistakes we make, the lessons we learn, and the amazing experiences we have along the way make our lives worth living.  And to be completely honest with you, if all of my dreams came true in the blink of an eye, what fun would it be?  Sure my book series would be a success and my business would be booming, but would I appreciate it as much without the journey?  Probably not.

So, with that said I am accepting the journey ahead of me with open arms and while fear may accompany me a little bit along the way, I vow that I will not allow it to become the captain of this ship.  Instead, I am moving forward with my dreams and as I do, I will go where my inspiration leads me and I hope you do too.

(Tomorrow I will give you a little insight into the inspirational nuggets that have appeared to me in the last few weeks. )

Fearless Living

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At the end of last week I decided I wanted to write a post about fear as far as dreams and goals are concerned.  In light of the events that happened in Boston on Monday, I know that this is the right topic to write about for there are various forms of fear that take place.

When I first heard about the tragic events on Monday, I was deeply saddened and as I posted on my Facebook status yesterday, I kept asking myself “why?”.  I don’t know if it is the common violent occurrences that are happening around the world or if it is because I am a mother now, but these things are taking a toll on me.  I have never been one to particularly fear for my safety, nor have I ever been ignorant to believe that bad things can’t happen to me.  I purposely do not watch the news for I don’t believe it adds to my life in any way and because it is nothing but “bad news”.  As you can tell I am far from the realist.

As I felt the sadness for what is happening in our world, I was reminded of the many people who ran to help the victims of the bombings.  Those dear souls that ran toward those in need instead of running away are the heroes.  They are the light in this dark event.  They helped strangers simply because it was needed and didn’t think twice about any other danger they may be putting themselves in.  They gave me hope.  That hope quickly fueled my decision to not live in fear.

As a parent, I am responsible for the safety of my child.  I have been given this wonderful opportunity to care for this incredible life and to make decisions that are right by him.  One of those decisions is to teach him to live the fearless life with a good dose of discernment.  I want my son to grow up and weigh the risks for his dreams.  To live his life fully without fear of rejection, fear of failure, and ultimately without fear at all.  I want him to be able to live in a world that honors his uniqueness and choices.  I want him to be able to live in a peaceful world.  And while I cannot stop the violence on my own, I can teach him that no matter how much negativity and violence we see on television and in the media, it will never outweigh the goodness that is in the world.

And the best way to teach him all of this, is through my actions.  More on how I will be doing that tomorrow.