Lamisha Serf-Walls

End of Year Tradition: Theme of the Year

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Vision of being open.

I have heard of many people using different methods to reflect on the past year as well as make plans for the new year and as I continue to flow with life and make plans for future, I have decided to set a theme for 2013.  I thought it would be a good way to set a specific focus for the year ahead and as I move through each day of 2013 if need be, I can look back at this post and remind myself of my intention and focus for 2013.

With that being said my theme for 2013 is: Be Open.  I want to be open to whatever opportunities, challenges, and changes that may present themselves in 2013 and to take those things in stride.  Instead of fighting the current and resisting ‘what is’, I want to be open to the lessons I may learn and the growing that may come from the changes and challenges in the coming year.

That is not to say that I am going to just let life happen to me in 2013.  In fact my plan is quite the opposite.  I am setting goals and intentions for the coming year, but instead of asserting my “control” over what I think should happen, I am going to flow with what actually happens and be open to it all.  This is a huge change for me as I often find myself disappointed that things don’t go exactly as planned.  So, while I am not flying completely blind with no plan in 2013, I will simply be open to whatever changes may come.  My hope is that in my effort to let go a bit more and flow with all that life entails, I will continue to find peace in every situation no matter what it is.

I would love to hear from you. What would you say your theme is for 2013?

Gratitude: Stillness and Peace

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This week was a pretty relaxing week to say the least. After a wonderful holiday with family and only a 2 day work week I am beginning to get used to this overall peaceful state of being and have set the intention to continue with peaceful living into the new year.

With that said this week I am grateful for moments of stillness and peace. I am currently reading a book called The Power of Peace In You by Marlise Karlin and have been inspired to not only incorporate more meditation in my (hopefully daily) life, but more moments of stillness too. I am realizing that these moments don’t have to be long moments and I don’t necessarily have to meditate for an hour a day, but I can benefit from a few deep breaths and stepping back from the hustle and bustle of life. But beyond that I am much happier and live a more peaceful and intentional life when I step back even just a little bit each day.

While I would love to get onto the habit of meditating before I begin each day, I know that may not always be feasible and as I flow with life, sometimes the current may take me away if only momentarily from my practice, and that is ok. But for right now I am grateful for the peace of mind and stillness I am carrying into the new year with hopes of continuing my practice even through challenging times.

What will you carry with you into the new year?

Make Room For Your Dreams

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I read a post last night from a friend regarding her experience of the “stuff” that is weighing her down and her intentions of letting it go.  It reminded me of something I have been thinking about for a few weeks now, as I have been making attempts to also clear out the old, to make room for the new (whatever that entails).

Have you ever heard the saying that when you open your hand to let go, it is also open to receive?  It can also be said that you must first let go of a little bit of your control to allow your dreams to manifest.  I think the same goes for making space, both literally and mentally, for your dreams to come true.  We often forget that in order to bring something new into our lives, we have to let go of the things that no longer serve us, be it behaviors, beliefs, or tangible objects that are blocking our ability to receive the resources we need to move forward.  Sometimes those beliefs, objects, or behaviors are all that we know and letting go of what we have always known for something that we can’t yet see is a scary venture.  I know, I have been there before.

The truth is our dreams are not guaranteed, but then again you could say that about anything in life.  The best we can do is have faith in ourselves and trust that we are not traveling this path by chance.  We are instead making a choice to live a life full of experiences, adventure and fulfilling our deepest desires and many times we must be willing to walk into the unknown to do it and sometimes that means letting go of the things that no longer serve your current reality to make room for the life you dream of.

I have always been much better at letting go of physical things than I am with letting go of my control (or perceived control as it may be).  I often find myself at the end of each season looking into my closet and donating items that no longer fit or things I haven’t worn in over a year.  I would much rather have the added space than the item I won’t use again.  When it comes to letting go of my expectations of myself or the beliefs I hold true about how my dreams should manifest, I am a bit more reluctant to let go.  Maybe it is because I am such a planner and when I get set on one plan, I begin to limit other possibilities.  Recently I have been thinking of what “stuff” I might need to let go of in order to receive the flow of energy, resources, and other contacts I need in order to make my dreams come true.

How can I make room for my dreams?

The first thing that comes to mind is time.  I hear people talking (myself included) about the lack of time they have, when really it is more about how you allocate your time.  Do you spend it doing things that will help benefit your dreams and goals or do you use it doing things that you feel you have to do?  Why not free up some time to do the things that will bring you closer to your dreams, no matter what it is?  For me this includes writing almost everyday.  I could become a much better writer if I committed to writing a little bit everyday and I could make the time if I got up only 30 minutes earlier each day.

Another thing I could do is clear out the belief that my dreams have to manifest based on the exact plan I have come up with.  My plan stems from what I believe is most feasible and realistic in achieving my dreams.  It is how I have come to know the world and my own abilities within it.  I know that by doing this I am not allowing the other innumerable possibilities to be an option.  My focus is so set on how I want it to happen, that I am quite possibly missing signs that could lead me in a direction I haven’t thought about.  I am by no means an expert in all the wonderful possibilities that my dreams could manifest, so how can I believe that there is only one way to do it?

I can’t.

I must be able to let go of the notion that I have it all planned out.  Sometimes, (actually most times) I don’t have the only way to do something and I frequently don’t even know the best way to do things.  When I let go of the idea that there is only one way to create my dreams, many more options present themselves.  The key is letting go and having faith that my dreams will come to fruition even if it isn’t the way I thought it would.  If I continue to believe in myself and my abilities and open my hands to release a bit of my control, my energy is then free to flow to the other possibilities that come my way.

So how can you make room for your dreams?  Do your dreams require you to pare down your belongings so you can travel the world for a year?  Maybe you want to start that business you have always wanted, but it means you have to free up some time, money, and space for that business to come alive.  Whatever dreams you have, what can you do to make room for them?

Remembering Self-Care

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I have said before that when I see, hear, or read the same message or theme in life, I tend to take notice.  It has happened again and this time the topic is self-care.  I have read many posts over the last few weeks about people trying to get back to taking care of themselves in the midst of the hustle and bustle of everyday life.  I can certainly relate to this, though I thought I had somewhat of a handle on it.

I was wrong.

I have found over the past week or so that I am taking much less time for me, and doing many other things that while they need to be done, (i.e. work, house chores, appointments, etc.), sometimes something just has to give.  There are only 24 hours in a day and while I could fill every bit of those hours being “productive”, the reality of the matter is I probably wouldn’t be all that productive without a bit of self-care added to the mix.

What is self-care?

I guess it depends on the person.  For me it is rest, relaxation, meditation, exercise, reading, writing, and just some general down time.  It also involves spending some time in nature either exercising, or just being outside (one of my favorite things to do).  Lately all of that has taken a back seat to work, getting caught up on things around the house, and other projects that I see daily that need to be done.  I know that I am far more stressed when I skip out on my self-care, but sometimes I get caught in this rut of being on the go, go, go, that I forget that if I don’t take the much-needed downtime then I won’t be go, go, going anywhere.

Point taken.

A dear friend of mine reminded me today that even squeezing a little bit of down time into my schedule could help me immensely.  She was right (as she is almost always).  So I am setting a new intention of doing at least one self-care item for myself each day.  This may involve a bubble bath, a long walk, extended meditation, or simply reading for 30 minutes, but I will fit it in.  Besides in the end the work, laundry, and my long list of to-do’s will be there when I am finished and I know I will come back feeling refreshed, and ready to focus.  In fact I know this to be true, because I tried it out already today.

I decided to take a 10 minute walk.  It wasn’t long and not enough to get my heart rate up, but just enough to get my blood pressure down (I’m assuming, I didn’t actually measure it), by being out in nature and enjoying some fresh air.  Combine the fresh air, a little walking, and the beauty of the clear skies and I am feeling like a new woman, so much that it makes me wonder why I let my self-care go for so long?  I guess the reason doesn’t matter because none of the reasons I can come up with will be good enough to let my health, (both mental and physical) suffer.

So there you have it.  As my work schedule gets a little more crazed I am going to make sure I work in those moments of self-care to ensure that I am not only taking time for me, but also not neglecting the people who mean the world to me (my son and partner).  Because let’s face it, life without joy and family, is not a life well-lived.

 

 

Winds Of Change

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My how the winds of change sweep in so quickly, or so it has seemed recently.  I mentioned last week how I had some good feelings about the rest of the year.  I felt like something was on the verge of happening in my writing world and it was going to be great.  I also mentioned that what I thought was going to happen didn’t.  With that said the winds of change are blowing and they are blowing in an unexpected, unforeseen opportunity that will help me move forward towards beginning my life coach training program.

What is it you ask?

This week I was notified of a change in some of my work responsibilities at my day job that will mean more work, more hours, but some extra income as well.  Doesn’t sound like a good change does it? Actually it is a good thing because the added income will be just what I need to move towards setting a date to begin my life coach training (more on that later).  It is also a reason to celebrate because I feel like I am truly making progress and progress is always a good thing.

I am also seeing change  in a new light.

Change and I have never been friends, in fact change is something that I both crave and fear.  Not knowing where my path may lead fills me with both excitement and dread as I begin to think of all of the possibilities that can come from it.  I guess it also depends on what type of change we are talking about, but this type of change that allows me to move forward towards my dreams is a change I am ready to make.  And while the added income will be great, there are some other trade offs I have to be willing to make in the short-term.

One of which is more work and potentially more stress.  More items on my to-do list that will require more organization and balance of my time.  Add to that weekend hours that I am not used to and the potential for a very chaotic, stress-filled experience.  But, since I know this ahead of time I am choosing to be proactive in my efforts.  Planning my time accordingly and remembering the benefits of this current sacrifice.  More money and more savings mean I can begin my training much sooner.

In addition to that, the more time I spend in a job that I don’t love is more motivation to work on getting my ducks in a row to begin my journey towards my life coaching business.  This may be a mini step and a little sacrifice, but in my book it is also a huge opportunity to move forward.  And for that I am thankful as I welcome the winds of change, for they are not only changing this moment, but have the opportunity to change the rest of my life.

Maybe change isn’t so bad after all.