Lamisha Serf-Walls

This is What I Know…

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I don’t know it all and can’t seem to learn enough, but here are a few things I know about you, me, and the dreams we want to achieve…

  • Everything and I mean EVERYTHING you want to achieve begins with a thought so allow yourself the time and space to daydream, visualize, and use your imagination to craft the most amazing scenarios of what your life can be. That is where the creative process begins, with a simple thought.
  • There is no dream that is too big to achieve.  Seriously, if you would’ve told me 10 years ago that I would eventually start my own business and be working with clients, I would’ve laughed at you.  At that point in my life the dream was too big to even consider, but I now know whatever you want to do, you can. Period.
  • You have a gift and it is meant to be used, given, shared, and highlighted in this life.  Use it, gift it, apply it, but whatever you do, don’t waste it.  Life is too precious to leave your song unsung, your book unwritten, or your dreams undone.  Stop questioning if you are good enough, special enough, or gifted enough to do it.  You absolutely are!
  • You are meant to do great things, thrive, and enjoy life.  It’s what life is all about.  So, stop questioning your worth, let go of the stories you keep telling yourself about why or how or when you will be able to do XYZ and just do it!
  • No matter where you are in your life, there will always be another excuse to wait.  There is no “perfect” time to do anything.  The best time is to start today.
  • Simple steps turn into big hits of inspiration that open doors of opportunities you never knew were possible.  Even the most miniscule act can create enough momentum to provide more progress than you know.
  • Your intuition is your guidance and when you are tapped into it, it will guide you along your path almost effortlessly.  The formula? Do what feels good and right and perfect…for YOU.
  • You don’t have to know the “how”, the “when” or the “why” right now.  Just trust that you will know the steps to take when the time is right and I promise you will be amazed at the resources, time, money, and contacts that arrive exactly when you need them.
  • Magic is real and so is your dream.  Believe in it, trust in it, and have faith that it is coming together even when you can’t see the physical signs.
  • You are supported always, 100% of the time.  There are people, friends, coaches, mentors, and others that will form your tribe to encourage and uplift you when you need it.
  • Taking a leap of faith allows the net to appear for you.  It is amazing what positive expectations can do.  It is true for me and it is true for you.  Try it. Trust it. Do it.
  • Have fun!  If I have learned nothing else on this journey it is to have fun and let loose.  Being playful opens you to receive an abundance of inspiration, opportunities, and energy to accomplish your dreams.  So don’t waste your days sitting in an office trying to make something happen.  Give yourself some doodle space. 🙂

What have you learned about yourself and your dreams this year?  Are you interested in learning more about what coaching is and how it can help you achieve your dreams?  I am offering free 60-minute sessions to any and all new clients to work on any issue, challenge, dream, goal, etc. in December and January and the slots are filling up fast.  If you are interested, contact me here to schedule your session.  I promise you won’t be sorry you did!

Accessing The Expert Within

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If I have learned anything this past year, or more accurately in the past month or so, it is the importance of listening to your intuition and making decisions that are right for you.  I have far too often fallen into the trap of wanting to always make the right decision whether it is in my business, family life, or other more mundane tasks like buying the right products.

You see, something you may not know about me is that I was very much a Ms. Goodie Two Shoes when I was younger.  Growing up I would beam with confidence when I received my gold stars for a job well done.  If the teacher was looking for a volunteer, I had my hand raised faster than she could blink.  I aimed to please and I wanted nothing more than to receive an abundance of accolades from the people I looked up to.  It doesn’t sound all that bad right?  I mean after all, I was on honor roll more often than not and I did very well in school.  But the downside to it all is that my delicate confidence depended on what other people thought of me and my decisions.  (Imagine the turmoil that ensued when my mother found out I was not her straight-laced-heterosexual daughter, but instead I was her seemingly-straight-laced-gay daughter….(gasp!))

While I have managed to step out of my comfort zone and do things the non-traditional (sometimes very non-traditional) way, I realized about a month ago that I still had this habit of seeking advice, knowledge, and insight about what I should do because I wanted to do what was right.  I didn’t want to make a mistake.  I wanted to select the perfect logo, find the perfect business name, and set up the perfect website that would draw in clients from every corner of the world.

I wanted everything to be perfect and I wanted everyone to like my new business (and me).

But the problem was that every comment, opinion, thought, and insight created a battle inside me, a battle between my gut/intuition and the oh-so-wise thoughts of someone else.  It was a battle that left me feeling more confused than ever and it wasn’t until I received a series of particularly hurtful comments that I finally realized what the struggle was about.

The struggle inside myself was a struggle against my inner knowing….the expert within.  You see, when you set out to fulfill your life’s calling there is a feeling you get that doesn’t go away.  It’s the feeling you feel when you first figure out what you want to do and the same feeling that keeps you moving forward when things get tough.  It’s the voice that tells you that it’s going to be alright and you will have all the things you need to make it happen.  It’s the resonance you feel when you meet people on your path who are exactly who you needed to meet to move to the next step.

That feeling, that voice, that resonance…is YOU.  medium_10770581383

Over the years, I have tried to live in a way that pleased those I deemed “experts” in life and when I set out on my journey to create a new business, I started moving down a similar path until my inner expert reminded me that I will find my way and know what direction to go because it will simply feel right for me.  It may not be right for everyone and it certainly won’t be the same path someone else took to get there, but it is mine and my inner expert will guide me to where I need to be, and yours will too.

You don’t need someone to map out your plan for you.  You have a wealth of knowledge and wisdom within you that will guide you along the way and you will know you are on your right path because it will feel right…for you.

You may be asking yourself if we all have inner experts then why in the world would we hire a life coach or anyone else to help us???

The truth is sometimes your inner expert will guide you to a life coach or someone else to help you on your path because it’s what you need.  As a coach I never tell my clients what they should or shouldn’t do.  Instead, we discuss the challenges, concerns, and struggles that may be holding them back from moving forward and when they are ready to make a decision, I help them tap into their own inner expert so they know what is right for them.  I also hold them accountable along their journey so that pesky thing we know as fear doesn’t get in the way of their incredible potential.

Whatever decisions you have to make as this year comes to an end don’t question whether it is the right or wrong decision based on someone else’s opinion instead, tap into the expert within and know that he/she will not lead you astray.

You are wiser than you believe yourself to be!

photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc

Where’s Your Doodle Space?

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I am so happy to be back on the blog today after a much-needed and much enjoyed few days off.  In fact, just before taking a few days off for Thanksgiving, I had a discussion with my life coach about just how important it is to create space in order to relax, regroup, and allow the thoughts, ideas, and inspiration to flow.  My coach called this space my “margin”.  You know like the margins on a piece of paper.

Being a visual learner it seemed like a perfect analogy for what I was not doing very well.  Instead of allowing myself extra space to fill in with fun thoughts, ideas, and doodles, I have been writing on every single, teeny, tiny space that is provided.  And then after I have tired myself out with all the extra “stuff”, I find myself annoyed, tired, and frustrated that I am having a hard time filling it in with doodles.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/linderesa/7925910376/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/linderesa/7925910376/

Why can’t I write, doodle, and create beautiful things??? Umm, maybe it’s because I was filling my space with a bunch of filler stuff that just made me feel (momentarily) like I had completed some monumental task…(ahem-laundry?).  The truth is that while I felt for a moment like I had accomplished a great deal, I wasn’t allowing myself to have fun.  I wasn’t being playful or allowing myself to relax.  So, what better time to relax than when family is in town for a holiday?

I decided that during my Thanksgiving time off I was not going to worry about work, writing, or anything else that I felt needed to be done.  I was going to allow myself the time and space to just enjoy the time off.  Simply put-it was awesome!!!

Did I come up with some magical ideas to take my business to another level or come up with an amazing book idea?  Nope. I just enjoyed time with my family, watched a few holiday movies (which I LOVE), and I read a bit.  I slept, ate, and enjoyed life.  In fact, most of my 4 days off was my “margin” time and it was incredible.

And you want to hear something funny?  I tell my clients to do the exact same thing, yet as a coach it can be difficult to remember.

It’s easy to set an intention and go-go-go until it is done, but that can often lead to a quick burn-out.  Instead of living your dream like it’s a sprint, enjoy the marathon.  It’s not about how quickly you get this done, because you will only come up with something else to accomplish next.  Instead of focusing on the end result, focus on enjoying the path and watching it unfold.  If that means making space for your doodles and allowing yourself the time to be playful and fun, do it!  I promise you will feel happier, healthier, and more inspired than ever before and you might even move closer to your dreams in new and exciting ways.

Today I encourage you to put down your to-do list, turn off your phone, log out of your email, and follow your heart to create a bit of doodle space.  I assure you it is well worth your time, even if you find yourself just relaxing outdoors or reading a good book.  Allow your intuition to guide you as to how to fill it in and if you can, implement a bit of room in your schedule for magical surprises to pop up…ya never know when a new one will appear. 🙂
photo credit: Linderesa via photopin cc

‘Tis The Season To Be Grateful

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As everyone in the U.S. is making final preparations for Thanksgiving tomorrow, I too have been MIA on the blog front, however I thought it was important for me to do a post on gratitude.  While I could go on about how gratitude is beneficial in life and in the pursuit of your dreams (and it is), I instead want to focus on the people, blogs, and many inspirations I have had in my life over the last year who have helped me (directly and indirectly) get moving on my dream.

I am grateful for:

  • Kenetha Stanton for inspiring me through her beautiful words to create a blog of my own (for the third time) and for providing the insight into how many of the WP functions work
  • Michelle Ward the When I Grow Up Coach who inspired me through her blog, her story, and the pursuit of her dreams to never let go of mine, and for tweeting a link to a post I wrote about her a few months back-pretty exciting stuff!
  • Jess Lively who also has reminded me through her candid details about her successes and disappointments the importance of ‘just keep going’ in life and in business
  • My amazing readers for following my journey, commenting on my posts, and just being here.  For those of you who follow my blog, you have no idea how grateful I am to you. THANK YOU!
  • My lovely coworker(you know who you are!) who told me to take a leap of faith in creating my business when I thought there were so many other things to do first and who has given me many pep-talks when I needed them.  That initial conversation was a game-changer for my dreams and everything else that followed.
  • Erin McNaughton aka my guinea pig client who took a leap of faith into the wonderful world of coaching with a newbie like myself and who has had amazing results from the 4 months we worked together.  Not only is she incredibly talented, but she is also inspiring, motivated, and the best first client a girl could ask for.
  • My other clients who have also followed suit in working with me.  You all are amazing and YOU are the reason I do the work that I do.
  • For those of you thinking of working with me in the future, thank you for considering me.  I would be honored to be a part of your journey to live the life of your dreams.
  • Last but not least, all of the many blogs that lift me up, make me laugh, cry, and leave me inspired to continue doing this amazing work.  There are too many to list, but know that I am so grateful for you as well.

I hope you all can spend some time reflecting on what you are grateful for this holiday season.  May you enjoy your holiday if you are celebrating and I will be back in full blogging-action next week.

Happy Thanksgiving and as always, thanks for reading. 🙂

 

Authenticity and Intuition

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Everyone who sets out on a new path into a future that is unknown experiences bouts of fear, insecurity, excitement, and a variety of other feelings that come with the territory.  It’s normal.  It’s expected and it’s sometimes necessary to learn extremely important lessons.  Do you know how I know this?  Because I have had to learn some pretty big lessons in authenticity and intuition.

You see, when you start something new you might look around to others for their help and expertise in various decisions and choices you are making.  Being a newbie in whatever field you are in, it is often suggested to have a mentor to provide guidance and insight into what you are doing.  It’s also great to have a second eye on new projects or things that you are working on in order to help you grow your skill set.  It doesn’t matter what your dream might be, but if it’s new, there will likely be some growing pains along the way.

But, what happens when you begin outsourcing decisions and opinions to a degree that you lose faith in your own ability to choose what is right and wrong for you?  What happens when you lose the little bit of confidence you had to begin with?

What happens is you lose the connection with your intuition and your authentic self, which can be detrimental to dream and your wavering confidence.

But wait a minute Lamisha, didn’t you say that it’s okay to ask for help and assistance when we are reaching for our dreams and that we don’t have to do it alone???

Yes I did say that and I still stand by that statement, BUT it is also important to stay true to who you are and to stay connected to your intuition.  Advice, insight, and assistance are all fine and good, but when it doesn’t feel right and goes against who you are, take note.  Whatever the suggestion is might not be what is right for you in that moment.

I don’t expect my clients (or myself for that matter) to know everything there is to know in order to accomplish their dreams, but I encourage them to listen to their intuition and use it as guidance for the choices they make.  Does that mean that if a suggestion is scary they don’t do it?

Not necessarily.  It can take some work to learn to differentiate between fear and intuition, but once you figure it out, you can begin feeling your way to the future life of your dreams.

It also doesn’t mean you won’t ever have to experience challenging lessons along the way.  Sometimes our intuition will lead us to exactly what we need to learn and experience, so take it as a gift and a lesson.

I guess what I am saying is to trust yourself.  Believe in your dream and trust that the path will light up for you and the steps, advice, inspiration, and action steps on your path will come when they are meant to.  If it just doesn’t feel right and you feel like you are creating someone else’s idea of your dream, then that’s not for you.  Take a step back and remember what your dream is and set the intention on being open to the steps that will keep your dream authentic for you. We all have experienced those “gut feelings” now and again, so tap into your intuition and I assure you it won’t lead you astray.