Lamisha Serf-Walls

It’s All About Love

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loveI love all things ‘love’.  As a Leo I am a hopeless romantic who enjoys all the traditional valentines gifts.  You know, chocolate, flowers, candles, perfume etc.  I enjoy it all.  I cry at happy endings to amazing love stories and anything that has a heart or the word ‘love’ on it you can bet your bottom dollar I want it.  But Valentines Day (and every other day of the year) isn’t just about romantic love.  We are moving into a world that offers a spirit of universal love in all forms and I LOVE that!

Not only are more people practicing random acts of kindness and sharing their love for humankind with one another, but we are moving into a period where more and more people are doing the work that they love.  More people are accepting their bodies, personalities, and true gifts each and every day.  More people are lending a helping hand when they see someone is in need and standing up for those who can’t speak for themselves.

It’s All About Love…keylove

Today and everyday, love yourself, treat yourself, and stop all that negative-dream-crushing-self-talk that keeps you playing small.  Be kind to others and to yourself!  Do more of what you love.  Find your gifts.  Love them and embrace them and for goodness sakes give them to the world!  Listen to your heart and follow the call to do work that you absolutely adore.  That passion you have burning in your soul, use it!  Support one another in struggles and successes.  Share, care, and collaborate when you can.  Uplift and motivate.  Inspire and ignite the fire that has been dormant for too many of us for far too long.

We are provided 24 amazing hours each day to live the best way we know how and I can’t think of a better way than to practice love in any way we can.  It’s simple to do if we can break away from our monkey minds, computers, smart phones, and get off of autopilot that we tend to be operating from most days.  Be conscious, aware, and open to how love may present itself to you.  You just might be surprised at how often you see, feel, and share it when you become aware.

And should you find yourself wondering where to begin, start with yourself.  Go out and do the things that bring you joy.  Paint, sing, write, crochet, dance, draw, read, take pictures, work out, create, or whatever it is that you haven’t given yourself the permission to do.  Go do that!

I truly believe life is meant to be enjoyed and love is meant to be shared, so get out there and do it!  And should you find yourself stuck, confused, or in a rut and unable to figure out how to move forward with your amazing passion, purpose, and dreams.  Know that I would be honored to be a part of your journey by sharing my gift of coaching with you.  There is nothing I love more than sharing in the excitement and wonder of my clients….except maybe chocolates and roses. 🙂

Now is your time to shine and do more of what you LOVE and I want to help you do that.  Contact me today to sign up for free consultation and find out how I can help you infuse your life with more love, inspiration, and joy.  You deserve it!

Why “Trying Harder” isn’t the Answer

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I cringe every time I hear the words “try harder”.  For some reason it sends the message that you just aren’t doing enough to make it (whatever it seems to be at the moment) happen.  It also suggests that if you are giving your all, it just isn’t enough.

Ick!  Just writing that makes me cringe.

I am not the kind of coach that is going to tell you to push through the pain and “try harder”.  I won’t tell you to power through or work harder at whatever you are doing. 

Why?

Because honestly, I care more than that and I don’t believe our dreams come true with blood, sweat, and tears (at least it doesn’t have to be that way).

I believe in a better way.

When clients come to me and say they are feeling stuck or in a standstill with the progression of their dreams, I try to tap into what they mean by “stuck”.  Are they stuck on ideas, actions, motivation, clients, or forward movement?  Do they need logistical assistance or is it an internal block we need to address?

Understanding where the glitch lies is paramount in helping them work through it.  Unlike how some sports coaches might tell players to work through the pain and “power through”, I just don’t believe in telling someone to “try harder”. 

I like to actually suggest the opposite.

Instead of pushing and fighting for the next step, what if you were able to take a step back and simple allow it to come to you?  What if you could relax, regroup, and trust that you don’t have to fight, claw, and force the answers to come.  What if right here, right now, you didn’t have to do anything?  What if they could simply flow….

In our society that is a big what if because we aren’t taught that growing up.  In school we are taught that if our grades aren’t high enough or if we aren’t doing well enough in a particular area, then we must try harder.  But what happens when we are giving our all and we still feel blocked?  What then?

Sometimes trying too hard pushes the thing we want to achieve, further away.  By forcing it and trying desperately to make it work, we cut off the flow of inspiration and energy.  We allow the frustration to settle in and when that happens, the fight gets harder.

Take writer’s block for instance.  For those of you who have ever experienced the Achilles heal of writing, you know the harder you try to force your words to flow, the harder it gets.  But, when you are able to step away, change your focus, get some fresh air, and then come back to it, it seems as if the clouds part and the heavenly writing angels sing.  Your thoughts turn into beautiful words that when weaved together create a tapestry of creative-awesomeness. flow

I believe the sweet spot for your dreams to become reality is in your inspiration.  When it feels hard, sticky, frustrating, or like your progress has reached a plateau, the answer is not to try harder. 

The answer lies in letting go of the reins and creating the space for your next step to appear.

How do you do that?  Here are a few things that I find helpful. 

  • Change your focus to something else. 
  • Sing, dance, or listen to music. 
  • Read a good book, go for a run, or do some yoga. 
  • Meditate, have coffee with your friends, or write in your journal. 
  • Laugh, smile, or do something nice for someone else. 
  • Take a hot shower, get a massage, or go for a walk.
  • Enjoy some time in nature, breathe deeply, and remember that all is working out for you.
  • Remember you don’t have to have it all done right this moment, but trust that you will have it done.
  • Enjoy the journey.  It’s so easy to get caught up in the decisions, steps, and plans we have in life, but in the grand scheme of things, the juice is in the journey.  Enjoy it!

You may find that your sticking points are scattered along your path as things grow and evolve, but if you can remember to flow instead of forcing the next step to come, you will not only soon be celebrating your dreams becoming reality, but will also find that you had fun along the way!

February Mini-theme: Authentic Connection

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I can hardly believe that we are at the end of January!  Did the month fly by for you as much as it did for me?

How are your 2014 intentions holding up?  This is usually around the time things start to turn south and people begin forgetting the reasons they started in the first place.  Missed goals, frustration, roadblocks, and sometimes just overwhelm can be enough to cause some people to fall back into old habits.  But, I am not going to let you do that.

Tomorrow is a new beginning (as is each day), but it is also a new month.  So, whatever ‘failures'(I hate that word) you feel like you had this month, wipe them clean and start fresh! Re-set yourself and keep moving forward.  Life happens and while we can’t stop it, we can flow with it, so here is your chance to FLOW.

With that said, it might be a good time to set a mini-theme for the month of February.

I was thinking about this a few days ago and decided that since my overall theme of the year is to “Show Up” and I had decided that December and January would be used to do as many introductory coaching sessions as possible (with a mini-theme of Service), it might be nice to set a mini-theme for February.

The purpose of setting a mini-theme is not to add one more thing to your to do list, but instead to help you focus on a specific area for the month.  You may decide you don’t want to change your theme every month and that’s ok.  Do whatever works and feels right for you.

The mini-theme I settled on is Authentic Connection.  Connection can mean so many things, but I want to take this month to really focus on connecting with my readers (you lovely dreamers), my Facebook and Twitter followers and other coaches/writers/blogs etc.  I want to support and connect with people from all over the world in a variety of ways.  This also applies to my ‘real life’ and not just my online life.  I want to chat with people in line at the grocery store and really see and hear people.  I don’t think we do enough of that overall, so that is my focus!

If you want to join me in selecting a theme for the month, I would love to hear what you choose!  Before you decide on a word, take a moment to tap into what you really need for the month.  Maybe it’s self-care, compassion, or kindness.  Maybe love for yourself, your clients, your neighbors, and strangers (February is the month for love).  Whatever you choose make sure it resonates with you and your path.

Feel free to share your mini-theme in the comments below and I would love to have you follow me on Twitter to post updates about your mini-theme.

Have a wonderful weekend and as always, thanks for reading!

Find Your Tribe

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When you finally take the leap into making your dreams a reality, everything seems so delicate.  Your ideas can be crushed by a simplest of things.  Confidence flies out the window when you are met with even the slightest challenge that can send your thoughts spiraling out of control.  The inner mean person comes out to play and tells you all the reasons you can’t win, won’t succeed, or shouldn’t even try.

In moments like these you need your tribe of supporters to remind you why you began in the first place.

Don’t have a tribe yet?tribe

Get one asap!

They say it takes a village to raise a child and I strongly believe that it takes a few good minds to help keep your dreams alive.  Sure you could do it on your own, but you might be met with more false starts than you care to have.

So who do you include in your tribe of inspiration and support?

Truth be told, you can include anyone that fits the description of loving, compassionate, supportive, and a good communicator to talk you off the edge when things get hairy.

While it might seem easy to include loved ones like family members and spouses in our tribe, sometimes that opens a can of worms in and of itself.  You see, those people already know you and your stories.  They have known you for years (in some cases your entire lives) and while their intentions might be good, they might inadvertently remind you of times you have tried and failed.

Some people use a mastermind group of people with similar interests to bounce ideas around with.  You might even find a few good groups on Facebook that you can find inspiration and support from.  The key is to find a group of people with who you can safely speak about your heart’s desires and receive the support you need when those negative thoughts come in.

Blogs are a good place to connect with like-minded individuals and so are online workshops or other interest groups.  You can also find similar support in a meet-up group or at places like a local yoga studio.  Get out there and get curious, you never know who you might connect with.  I have found many amazing groups on Facebook as well and they have proven to be invaluable in the amount of support they have provided.

Have you already found your tribe?  If so, how did you meet?

Would you be interested in a circle of support for your amazing dreams? Answer in the comments, I would love to know!

Would you be interested in a free support circle for dreamers like you?
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