Lamisha Serf-Walls

Following The Signs To Clarity

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I have talked a little bit about synchronicities and following the signposts of life as you venture down your given path. I have often found these signs in books, quotes, a newsletter, or sometimes even songs where a specific topic or set of words just jump out at me and make me think “Aha!”. Well today was one of those days and boy did I have some things jumping out at me.

Over the last few weeks I have been having an internal struggle about what I believe my truth to be. By truth I mean, where I am going, what I am doing, and how my spirituality and belief system is made up (both about myself and the world/society as a whole). I haven’t ever questioned my truth or my spirituality, and don’t particularly find myself questioning it now, but rather wondering how my truth fits into what others believe etc. In the midst of the fog and somewhat confusion I was feeling, I could hear my internal dialogue asking for clarity. I wasn’t looking for it in any given form, nor did I expect it to come about the way it did, but what I found was a series of synchronicities that kept coming about throughout the day. It was as if the Universe/God/Powers that be, was giving me the clarity I was seeking. Simply put, it was amazing.

I’d like to tell you what it was that set these moments of clarity in motion, but I don’t have a formula. I started my day feeling a bit uneasy and since I am committed to my 100 day meditation challenge, I thought what better way to handle such feelings than to be still and quiet my thoughts. Afterwards, I felt a little better, but couldn’t shake this feeling that left me off balance. So instead of trying to push it away, I sat with it. Moving through my morning the way I would normally and allowing the feelings, uneasiness, and day to progress as it should. That is when I stumbled upon a post from one of my favorite blogs the Journey Through The Chrysalis. I found her words lighten my mood and bring a bit of clarity to what I was feeling. I began to feel better and as I did the signs just kept coming.

Almost immediately after reading that post, I saw a status update on FB and an article posted almost simultaneously, providing even more clarity to my particular situation. And it didn’t stop there. Over the course of the day, I had read, heard, and seen several other articles, videos, and blog posts that were either dealing with this particular issue, or reminding me to be open, something I had forgotten over the last few days. Once I reminded myself of my theme for the year, I relaxed. The uneasiness subsided, the chaotic thoughts in my mind calmed down, and I was still. It was then that I allowed myself to let go of this picture I had painted in my mind as a struggle and looked at it from a different view. It is no longer a struggle, it is simply a way for me to grow, both in my own spirituality, but also in how I deal with everything I see as a struggle.

What looks like a struggle from one view, can be very different when you step out of it for a moment and be still, something I was reminded of in my own meditation as well as from Candy Coated Reality (this post is great). Sometimes you even have to get quiet and just listen and if you don’t hear something right away, give it some time and be open to whatever comes your way, you never know where your guidance may show up.

Meditation Challenge Update

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For those of you who don’t know, I have recently taken on the challenge of meditating everyday for 100 days.  I have never been good at meditating everyday even though I am well aware of the benefits it can have on mental health, energy, and overall well-being.  And to be honest with you when I accepted the challenge, there was a part of me that wondered if I would be able to fit it in each day.  But here we are on day 10 and I have meditated everyday of January so far.  That in and of itself is an exciting thing for me.

With that said I thought I would share a bit of my experience thus far.  The first few days were a bit hectic as I didn’t have a set time to meditate, nor did I do it  in the same place, or by using the same method for that matter.  Needless to say I was inconsistent and the quality of each experience wasn’t all that great.  My mind wandered far more that I liked and I didn’t feel as focused or calm as I am used to feeling after a good meditation.  So I figured I would streamline my practice a bit more while still having some flexibility, so I can still flow with whatever life throws at me.

Here’s what I do:

  • I turn on some quiet meditation music
  • Sit in a comfortable position either in a chair or on the floor
  • Close my eyes
  • And breathe

Sounds simple huh?  It is…sort of.  Getting into meditation and clearing my head of all the noise is the most difficult thing for me to do, but as my mind wanders and begins thinking about what I will be doing in the next few hours, I try to focus on the music, or tune into specific areas in my body bringing my awareness back to myself and not my thoughts.  Sometimes I am very successful, sometimes not so much, however I keep going.  At this time I don’t have a specific amount of time that I sit in meditation, but I have reached a max of 15 minutes with hopes of getting it up to 30 by the end of the challenge.

So how do I feel so far?

the results of just 10 inconsistent days of meditation have been incredible.

Here’s what I have experienced:

  • Better mood overall
  • A sense of peace and relaxation afterwards
  • More focus
  • Anticipation for my next meditation
  • Less worry, more faith that things are going to work out in all areas of life
  • A deeper connection to my intuition and dreams

Another thing I am experiencing (though I am not sure if it is a result of my meditation practice, or if it relates to my theme of the year) is an increase in opportunities that seem to fall into my lap, as well as an overwhelming amount of confidence on my part to take on projects that in the past would have overwhelmed me.  Maybe my meditation practice is supporting me as I go with the flow of life and if that is the case then I look forward to what lies ahead while still remaining in this moment as completely as I can.

So that is where I am at after 10 days.  Look for the next update on day 30!

Do The (Midnight) Hustle

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Over the last few years I have come in contact with a handful of innovators looking to start (or recently started) their own businesses in various ways.  Some people were following their creative hearts, while others were simply looking for a way to be their own boss and spend more time with their families, but regardless of what these people were doing, one thing was common amongst them, the midnight hustle.

If you don’t know what that is let me explain.  The midnight hustle is the way many new business owners, creators, and innovators make their business dreams a reality.  Let’s face it, not many of us have the riches to simply quit our day jobs to follow our dreams without cultivating and growing our business on the side and by “on the side”, it likely means during the midnight hours when other people are sleeping, hence the name midnight hustle.  And with that midnight hustling often comes late nights, less sleep, hard work, and hopefully amazing inspiration to keep you moving toward your dreams so you can one day quit your day job and enjoy the fruits of your labor doing something that you truly enjoy.  And while I am far from quitting my day job, I am experiencing a bit of my own hustle as I reach beyond my comfort zone into new opportunities and new territory.  It’s exciting and terrifying all at the same time.

I have talked a little bit about my dream of starting my own life coaching business, but the truth is my dream isn’t to start the business per se, it is really to help people through my business.  I thought the path would be fairly straight forward, but I am finding that I may be taking a bit more of the scenic route as opposed to the straight shot as I go with the flow of life.  The programs I have found in the last year haven’t really touched me in the way that makes me think, “Yes this is the ONE!”, so I have been researching various programs in hopes to find the one that best fits my purpose and calling.  I think I have finally found it.  (YAY!) But, with it comes a pretty hefty price tag, one that is about double the price of the last program I was going to settle on.  So, it looks like the actual training may be put off longer than expected, but as you well know I am not one to sit around and do nothing and being the jack of many trades that I am, I am following an equally creative and exciting interest, writing.

The truth is I have always enjoyed writing but I have just recently begun to make some money from it and it is becoming a bit of a midnight hustle for me.  While I only have one regular gig right now, I am learning that the key to having one or many midnight hustles is balance and knowing your limit, both things I am working on right now.  I am very aware of the amount of time I have in my days (and nights) to complete writing projects and am working on a bit of a writing schedule that will allow me to continue to share my journey here on my blog (because I love it so much), and to still complete writing projects in a timely manner.  My hope is that my current midnight hustle will help support the training I need for life coaching and things will seamlessly flow with one another leading to (one day) quitting my day job to do something I love.  But, until that day comes I am going to consciously balance my time to include self-care, meditation, and family because life shouldn’t be all about work, it should be fun too.

Do you have a midnight hustle? If so what is it?

Unexpected Opportunities For Growth

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Today, the first day of 2013, I had expectations that I would spend day dreaming. I envisioned today would be filled with relaxed moments, reflection, and loose planning for the year ahead. But what I experienced was far from relaxation.

I began my day feeling a bit off kilter. I couldn’t pinpoint what the problem was exactly, but I could tell something felt off. Instead of feeling energized about the newness of the year, I was feeling lethargic and a bit on edge. Throughout the day I found myself reacting rather intensely or over reacting in some cases to seemingly small things. My patience was wearing thin and I realized my frustrations were coming from my lack of flow with the events of the day and my lack of perceived control. And while the aspects of the day that were outside of my “control” are not important, I had a pretty strong epiphany by the end of the day.

As 2012 came to a close I decided to choose a theme for this year that would help me keep my focus this year. Incidentally my theme for this year is to be open and by that I mean open to not only the good things, but the challenges and lessons as well. I realized today that I was not only asking for opportunities to remember to be open but in some ways I had attracted these opportunities to flow and be open to life.

Simply deciding to be open or be more patient doesn’t necessarily mean there is an instant change. In fact, any growth or change takes place over time and lasting change happens when we choose to respond to situations in a different way over and over again. What I soon realized is that the challenges I was having today was simply an opportunity to respond differently. This was the beginning of my year of being open.

I believe when I chose the theme for this year I sent a message to the Universe that I am now ready for opportunities to choose to be open, to choose differently than I have in the past. And while I didn’t expect to have my theme challenged on the first day of the year, I firmly believe it is through these moments I will be able to continue to grow and become better at being open and flowing with life, not only in the good times, but also in the challenging times.

Reflection: Surviving to Thriving

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I often find myself sitting in contemplation, reflecting on a certain situation, thought, or book I have read recently.  It isn’t abnormal for me to turn inward for a few days as I think about whatever it is that has given me reason to reflect, and a few weeks ago someone said something to me that got me thinking.  In a conversation I was having about a particular challenge I was dealing with someone said “No matter what you have encountered in your life, no matter how hard it may have seemed, you have always survived.”  In the moment that comment didn’t seem like much, but in the last few weeks I have been reminded of that comment over and over again.

Many times when we are stuck in a rut or dealing with a particular challenge, it is easy to feel like our world is crumbling and everything is falling down on us.  The negative aspects of life seem to be highlighted and we can easily be convinced that we are failing at whatever it is we are attempting to do.  We may think we aren’t good enough, smart enough, attractive enough, and simply don’t measure up to whatever standards we are measuring ourselves by.  It is during those times we believe the illusion that we are destined to fail when the truth is we have made it this far and have been through far worse things in life than this very moment.  And as I have pondered that comment, I realized that yes I have survived every challenge I have encountered and I am better for it.  Of course you couldn’t tell me that in the moment of a complete meltdown, but it is true.

The more I contemplate that thought, the stronger I feel.  I know that I have seen, experienced, felt, and lived some terrible things in life and the “challenges” I experience now are nothing compared to them.  And beyond all that I am here.  I am stronger, wiser, and honestly more creative than ever because of my past and the challenges I have faced.  So yes, I have always survived.  Yes, I will make it through the next proverbial storm. And yes, I am still growing, but I am moving into a phase of my life that is more than just surviving.  I am moving into a phase of life where I thrive.

A phase of life where my dreams transform my reality faster than I can dream it, and my life is wonderful.  Not wonderful because everything is fine and dandy, but wonderful because I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am strong enough to handle whatever comes my way.  I am learning life lessons and embracing change more than I have ever before and if you know me ( and many of you do), you know this is no small feat.  And as I write this I know I may need to be reminded of my strength and my ability to thrive when life throws me a particularly difficult situation and during those moments I will read this post and remember the strength that lies within.