Lamisha Serf-Walls

Are You In Danger of This? (And how not to sacrifice your happiness.)

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Danger

 

What if someone could tell you without a shadow of a doubt the way your future will likely unfold if you continue on the exact course you are on this very minute?

Would you be interested?

No, I’m not switching businesses and becoming a psychic 🙂

I ask you that because I know something that you might not be aware of and again I’m no psychic, but I have seen this enough to know that you might be in danger.

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Meet Joni* (Names have been changed for privacy sake.)

Joni is an incredibly talented entrepreneur.  She’s sweet, charismatic, caring, compassionate and people adore her!  She’s married to her soul mate, has a gorgeous home, and is blessed with creativity that flows like an open faucet.  Her business is booming and her calendar is booked out 9 months!

BUT…

She’s got a problem and it’s a BIG one.

She is having a hard time finding balance amongst all the awesomeness that is her life.

When she is in work mode, she’s hard-core.  She works long hours, stays up late, and often burns the candle at both ends.

When she manages to find time to focus on her ‘home’ life with her hubby, she is constantly trying to make up for lost time.

She’s lost on the teeter-totter of two extremes and no matter what she does she can’t quite find the happy medium.

The result:

She’s frustrated and cranky most days.  When she’s focused on her business, she worries about her relationship and the many things at home that feel half-assed or un-done.  When she’s at home, she worries about being at work. She thinks: “What if my clients need me?  What about the next deadline?  The next launch? Did I return all important emails?”

She’s stuck, overwhelmed, and feels guilty about not being where she needs to be and often feels like a failure.

She frequently discounts her successes or over looks them completely because she becomes hyper-focused on the things that aren’t working (aka not being able to find balance).

What on the outside looks like an awesome life, on the inside feels unbalanced and incomplete.  She frequently thinks that “if only” she could find the balance between her two very important worlds, she could finally ease into relaxation mode and actually enjoy the magnificent life she has created.

But without being able to see the core issue (which is not the lack of balance in her life), she is destined for a life of exhaustion, fear, frustration, and stuck-ness. She is blind to the belief that is holding her back because she is simply too close to see it.  What she thinks is a simple fix that centers around time management and taking a break every now and then is really just a symptom of a deeper issue.

She has a choice.  She can continue to try to treat the symptom (i.e. the lack of balance in her life) and experience the brief reprieve that it provides for her or she can choose to seek help.  And to be honest, she must first understand and be aware of the consequences of not clearing this issue.

Examples:

  • A stressed work life can result in physical illness
  • A stressed home life can result in relationship trouble
  • A stressed inner life can result in incredible fear, lack of confidence, self-sabotage, and even worse…an unhappy, unfulfilled life.

Getting to the end of her rope and being truly ready to move through this challenge once and for all, Joni reaches out for help.  She knows the magnificence that lies on the other side of this struggle and she’s ready to identify and clear the belief that is holding her hostage in exhaustion, fear, and frustration.

The question is are YOU?

happinessMany of you may be able to directly relate to the specific challenge or symptom that Joni has struggled with or you have your own issue that manifests itself in your life or business in your relationships, self-care, time management, procrastination, marketing (or lack thereof), or maybe it is something different.

The point is we all have that one thing that keeps showing up for us over and over again that leaves us feeling drained, frustrated, and just plain stuck.  There are some of you who are ready to throw in the towel and accept that ‘this is just the way life is’ and you may even believe ‘you just can’t have it all’.

But I am here to tell you, there IS a solution to your problem and it starts with this first step: You must first know the consequences of continuing on the path you are on and refuse to sacrifice the joy and fulfilling life you are destined for any longer.

That’s it.

Life is supposed to be amazing and you are meant to work through the lessons, beliefs, and challenges that hold us back from that incredible joy.  It is part of your journey, but you get to choose if you are ready to move forward and clear it and some of the biggest challenges are those we can’t see directly because we are simply too close.

With that I ask you:

What amazing-ness are you sacrificing by staying stuck? AND Are you ready to take the first step to free yourself from the struggle and frustration?

If so, I invite you to schedule a 30-Minute Consultation to chat with me about your challenges and to see if (like Joni) you are ready to clear them once and for all.  No strings attached.  So what do you say? Are you ready?

P.S. Don’t forget that the 7-Day Resolution Refresh challenge begins on Monday so if you are in need of some inspiration to get some of those amazing goals knocked off your to-do list, get signed up so you don’t miss a beat!

 

3-Simple Steps to Identify Your B.S. (aka Blind Spot)

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So, now that you know what a Blind Spot (B.S.) is, I thought it would be helpful for me to share with you a few tips on how you can identify your own.

While it isn’t always obvious when you are looking at your own life and experience, these three steps will help you get a handle on where your B.S. might be hiding.

Try it out and let me know what you come up with.  I promise while these steps are simple, the outcome paves the way for major clarity and growth so you can clear the blocks and move forward with ease and grace.

 

Have You Identified Your B.S. (It’s not what you think.)

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B.S. _

Hey Lovely!

I know you.

You’re the kind of woman who knows what she wants and has no problem making shit happen.  Your vision is clear and you are no stranger to putting in the effort to make your dreams come true.  That’s how you got to be where you are.

People look at you and are in awe.  Your power, energy, magic, and positive vibes make people come out of the woodwork to connect with you.

It’s no surprise really, I mean you exude success at every turn and people are taking notice.  You are a force to be reckoned with for sure and there are tons of people who admire you.  Truth be told, they want what you have so they can make that magic happen in their own lives.

Passion pours from your soul and whether you are writing, designing, coaching, crafting, singing, dancing, performing, selling, speaking, consulting, organizing, healing, teaching, or anything else that happens to be your gift, you are simply fantastic….

At least that’s how they see it right?

But you and I know the truth, we know the WHOLE story.

Beyond the magic, miracles, success, drive, passion, and purpose there is something that you just don’t want to think about (let alone discuss with your admirers).

It’s the challenge that keeps rearing its ugly head no matter what you do.

That area of your life that can at times cause you to forget about all of the other amazing things that you bring to the table because that one thing is off.  And try as you might, you have not been able to tick that box.

You’ve read the books, repeated the affirmations, and maybe even tried to wrestle that damn thing to the ground, but to no avail.

You know what I call that?

That my dear, is your BLIND SPOT (or rather a symptom of your blind spot) and before you worry your pretty little head about it, I want you to know that we all have one (or two or three).

Your Blind Spot is the thing you can’t quite see that is holding you back.

Have you ever wondered why life coaches have their own coaches?  It’s because of that dreaded Blind Spot.

When you are immersed in your own life or business, you are simply too close to see what you are unconsciously saying, doing, believing, etc. and you likely aren’t aware of what is holding you back.  And knowing what isn’t working in your life or business (i.e. the symptom) is the first step in identifying and clearing your Blind Spot.

The truth is this: Our Blind Spots bull shit us. 

They make us believe we aren’t good enough in some capacity and can leave us feeling frustrated, sad, angry, and at times worthless which causes us to ignore our greatness.

Tell me this: What is your Blind Spot costing you?

Happiness? Money? Clients? Bliss? Your dreams? Love? Romance? Adventure? Time?

Is it worth it?

I can tell you from experience it’s not.  Life is too short to go on with a block that can be illuminated and cleared with a bit of assistance.

Lucky for you, I am the Blind Spot Expert and have recently been through my own clearing that has taught me some amazing lessons that I will be sharing with you along with information on how I can help you identify and clear your own Blind Spot.

But for today I want to know this:

What is that thing that isn’t working in your life or business and what is it costing you right now? (I’ll give you a hint.  It’s the first thing that you thought of when you read that line.)

Share your answer in the comments below.  We are in this together because I guarantee we all have one! Let’s get it out in the open so we can clear it and take your life, your business, and your dreams to amazing new heights!

Confession Time: I Didn’t Listen To My Heart…and I Failed (sort of)

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To be honest with you, I have been dreading writing this post.  Part of me knew I had to do some processing mentally and emotionally before I could put anything in writing and the other part of me was just plain embarrassed.

Embarrassed of looking like a fraud, a scam, a loser and my worst fear…a FAILURE.

So what did I fail at exactly?

I failed at listening to my intuition when it told me something wasn’t a good fit.

I failed at recognizing the signs that reinforced something wasn’t a good fit.

I failed at standing in my power to declare to myself and YOU that it’s ok to pull the plug on something that isn’t a good fit.

So what is this elusive ‘thing’ that isn’t a good fit?

The 90-Days To Biz Brilliance program.

Yep, the program I was so excited about (initially before the signs) and the same program I put off releasing twice for various reasons (because I clearly ignored the signs.)

The short story is this.  I fell into the trap of thinking that other people know me better than myself and while some of my clients are female entrepreneurs, I am not a ‘business coach’.  Here’s where it gets a little confusing even for me.  The biz brilliance program is actually full of amazing content, support, information, and practices to handle the stuff that comes up when you are creating a business, but it is also good for people NOT in business.

I was excited about the program.  I shared it with you and in various other networks happily.  I loved the feeling of the program, but something I couldn’t quite put my finger on felt off.  The more I shared, the more off it felt.  And when the feeling got to be too much, I knew that it wasn’t going to fly, but I was too afraid to pull the plug for fear of looking unprofessional.  I didn’t want anyone to think any less of me and to see me the way I was seeing me in that moment…a failure.

But despite all of that this is what I have learned:

  • I now know what the off feeling feels like in my body and I can use that in the future
  • I took a HUGE step to create a program that has good bones and can be used in another way…later
  • I am not a failure
  • I now have more clarity about what isn’t a good fit for me, which is equally as important as knowing what is
  • Life (and my business) goes on despite this bump in the road
  • Listening to my intuition and inner wisdom is always the best way

It is imperative to trust that tiny whisper within that tells you something isn’t right and the nudge you get to go in a particular direction.  Learn to listen to yourself and let go of the other stuff that doesn’t feel right for you.  Tap into your intuition on a daily basis and allow it to guide you forward.  It takes practice, I know especially when you are in business and there are so formulas for ‘success’.  Your success will come to you in a way that feels right and fits your path.

Another big thing this experience taught me is that trying is succeeding in its own right, so keep trying.  Keep experimenting and keep going.  Do you know how many times Albert Einstein ‘failed’ in his experiments before he got one ‘right’?  If one of the most amazing scientific geniuses in history can ‘fail’ a few times to get to something incredible, then don’t you think we can too?

Life is about experience, so remember that as you try and try (and try) again.  Don’t forget to trust too.  Trust is a big part of the process.  Knowing that you will get to where you are going as long as you keep going.

 

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P.S. We are entering the last 4 months of the year (where does the time go!) and I know there are dreams and goals that you have been procrastinating on.  It’s time to get a Jump Start don’t you think? My 1-month Jump Start package is available to help you take big action and get moving immediately toward your dreams.  Haven’t you waited long enough?  Get signed up for your free 30-minute consultation to get started for September. 

When Life Happens…Just Flow With It

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No matter what you are doing or how great things are, life happens and during those moments of chaos when we sometimes feel the need to fight the current and get back to the balance we are used to, it’s usually best to just flow with it.

I thought I would share a bit about my current chaos and how I am handling it. 🙂

 

P.S. Don’t forget about the Epic Birthday Giveaway!  You officially have a week to register to win 1 of 13 amazing gifts.  Hop on over to this post check it out. Good luck!