One of the first things I ask people about when I am working with them is what they want in life.
Usually I get a list of items, dollar amounts, places they want to travel to, and a whole slew of other ‘stuff’ that comes with their dream life. Whether it’s the career of their dreams, the relationship they have always desired, or their health, there is always ‘stuff’ that they want.
And when I ask them why they want what they want, I am often met with a pause in the conversation.
It’s not about proving that you are worth having the life of your dreams, because you are already worthy enough to have it. Remember you can be, do, or have anything that your heart desires.
The reason I ask why, is because like the blocks that are holding us back, there is something that lies beneath the desire to be, have, or do anything
Take me for example. When I took the leap to live the life of my dreams, I did so with the intention of creating my own business that I loved. I wanted to help people know they too could craft a life they have always wanted and I absolutely adored the work. But, after some insightful questions and a bit of digging from a coach I was working with at the time, I realized it’s something far deeper for me.
Underneath the sparkly dream of owning my own business and helping people are three values that are extremely important to me.
Freedom, family, and service.
I want to feel free in the work I do.
I want to have the flexibility and freedom to support my family from anywhere in the world and since I am a military spouse that is even more important to me.
And I want to be of service to my clients.
I want to help people do the things they never thought possible and live the life they have always wanted.
So, I have set out on a path to design a life that does just that. That is what I am after. Those are things that are important to me. The extra “stuff” is just icing on the cake.
One of my clients has been working with me for several months and in that time we have worked on identifying what it is she truly wants out of life, giving herself permission to live that life, and helping her achieve it. One of her core values is freedom. She wants to have the freedom to choose to live the life of her dreams. To travel, to learn, to grow, and to be who she wants to be, not who others perceive her to be.
In fact, most of my clients have freedom as one of their underlying values in the work we do together. Whether it is freedom to spend their time & money how they want or the freedom to choose to live life on their own terms.
They want freedom.
So, why is knowing your underlying values important when you are creating the life of your dreams?
It’s simple, because when you let go of the specific outcomes and focus on the values that are important to you, you loosen your grip on how it must happen and allow the energy of the Universe to work on your behalf to deliver all those values with beautiful circumstances wrapped up with a pretty bow. And you realize you just created a life you never thought was possible.
You see, it’s when we get our hands too far into the mix that we can often make things harder for us to achieve. But when you focus on values like freedom, flexibility, support, service, family, etc. you find that it’s much easier to welcome in the unexpected surprises that make life interesting & exciting. You tend to go with the flow a lot easier and trust that everything you want in life can and will be yours.
So, when you think about the investments you are making into self-growth & expansion, don’t ask yourself if the ‘stuff’ is worth it. Ask yourself if the freedom, flexibility, comfort, peace, etc. is worth it because that is what you are truly after. It’s not about how you get to those feelings that is as important as the feeling itself. Just like it’s not money you are after, it’s the amazing experiences that money allows you to buy that is what you are after.
Today, I invite you to take a look at your values. What lies beneath the external ‘stuff’ you want in life? Are you building the life of your dreams on a foundation of physical things or are you building it on a foundation of experiences and values like family, support, stability, flexibility, and freedom?
Know how you want to feel and what is truly important to you and you open the doors for those feelings to flow to you instantly.
And to take it a step further, what is one thing you can do today that will help you tap into those values. Do it now, not sometime in the future.
I’d love to know what your #1 value is and what you can do today to cultivate that feeling. Share in the comments below to get the energy moving.
