Lamisha Serf-Walls

What is Your Olympic Moment?

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olympics

For as long as I can remember, I have always been a huge fan of the Olympics.  I have always been amazed at the inspiration, the power, and drive the athletes have to accomplish their dreams.  In fact, I was so enthralled with the 1996 Summer Olympics (particularly when the gymnasts were performing), that I decided not to be in the room when my brother was born. (The Olympics being on and the fact that I was 14 and totally freaked out by the idea of being in the room 🙂 )

The 2014 Winter Olympics are no different.  I’m still inspired, uplifted, and amazed at what these dreamers are accomplishing and many at such young ages.

So, this weekend while watching the figure skating competition and hockey (which I have never been interested in), I began thinking about my own ‘Olympic moment’ and yours too!

If we could dissect how each individual Olympic athlete started out and how they got to where they are now, what do you think we would find?

Would we find skiers who always wanted to do amazing tricks on the half-pipe or figure skaters that were just naturally talented at doing the swizzle spin?

My guess is we would find regular people who found something they loved to do and just kept doing it.

In fact, they probably followed their inspiration and followed it with focus and action to get to where they are now.  Did they all set out to be Olympic Champions?  Maybe, maybe not.

But what I know for sure is that they absolutely love what they do.  If they didn’t, they certainly wouldn’t do the things they do every day to make their dreams come true.

So, I ask you this.  What is your Olympic moment?  Is it when you get your business off the ground or when your book gets published?  Maybe it’s when you finally quit that job you have hated for years to pursue your artwork full-time.

Whatever it is, I have a feeling that it can and will evolve.  Once you reach one moment, a new dream, challenge, or passion will look enticing and you will set a new goal.  It’s natural, it’s life, and it is what makes this journey so amazing.

For the athlete striving to make it to the Olympics, their moment might be to simply qualify and then to move into the finals and eventually win a medal or defend their title.

Like every Olympic athlete, do what you love and follow your passion.  Use your inspiration and follow it up with action. Believe in yourself!  I know you can make it to whatever your ‘Olympic moment’ may be, but the important thing is that YOU know that.

Go, dream, do! and then do it all again.

I’ll be looking for you on the podium 🙂

 

What’s Your ‘But’ Statement?

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If you ever meet me out in public and we start chatting about your career, work, or hobbies, beware!  I might just ask you the question I love to ask and found myself asking to almost every person I have worked with in the last 10 years and that question is this:

If you could do anything in the world (and money weren’t an issue), what would you do? (Sometimes the question is phrased differently depending on if I am speaking to someone about their career or just a general hobby.)

It doesn’t matter what answer you give, I will most certainly follow it up with this:

So why aren’t you doing it?

After a string of answers like : “Because I have a family to support.” or “It’s too late.” or “I don’t know where to begin.”

I get to the nitty-gritty of why people aren’t accomplishing their dreams and it goes a little something like this.

“I would love to start my own non-profit activity center for children, BUT I just don’t have the money to do it.  I mean I do have bills to pay!”

OR

“I would love to sit in a little cabin in the woods somewhere and write books all day, BUT what if I can’t do it?”

OR

“I would love to open my own bookstore/coffee shop/literary center for the community, BUT I’m broke and I have to keep my crappy job because it’s all I have.”

The truth is we all have a ‘but’ statement and what that is, is the reason we feel we can’t/shouldn’t/will never/won’t accomplish the life of our dreams.  For many of us it boils down to dollars and cents.  For others, it’s simply knowing how to get started, but I think it’s more than that.Fear

You see, I am finding more and more that your ‘but’ statement (no matter what it is) is really another form of fear.  For the person that says they don’t have enough money, they may fear losing what they have on their dream that feels so risky.  For the person that just doesn’t know how to start, it could be fear of failure.  For the person afraid of whether they can do it or not, it could be fear of ridicule both self-induced and the ridicule of others.

Regardless of what form your ‘but’ statement takes, what it really is, is a form of fear manifesting as an excuse.  If you would have asked me 2 years ago why I wasn’t on my path to coaching already I would have told you I didn’t have the money to do it.  I couldn’t afford the training programs I thought I needed to succeed.  It took a long time for me to even entertain the thought of doing things differently.

Today, I encourage you to identify your ‘but’ statement.  The truth is, you probably have more than one, so write them down and face them.  Get them out of your head and utilize your amazing imagination to think of all the ways those fears can become irrelevant.

If lack of money is one of your fears, then think of all the ways money can flow into your life.  Some examples might be gifts, a raise, a new job, selling old stuff, refunds, rebates, unexpected checks in the mail etc.  There are an abundance of ways for money to flow and for your dreams to come true.  Don’t limit yourself to the singular road you ‘think’ will lead you to what you desire.  There is so much more out there if you open your mind to the possibilities.

The first step is identifying your ‘but’ statement.  So, if I asked you about your dreams, what would you say?

” I would really love to _____________, BUT _______________.” Fill in the blanks.

If you are ready to talk more in-depth about your ‘but’ statement and what is really holding you back from the life of your dreams, contact me to schedule your consultation.  I would love to hear more about what lights you up and how I can help make your dreams a reality.  The truth is, if more people were doing the things they love the world would be a much happier place, so let’s do our part.  

This or That: What To Do At a Crossroad

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crossroad

Happy Tuesday Lovely readers!

How many of you have been in a situation lately or in your life when you have had to make a decision?  I’m not talking “what shall I have for dinner tonight” although for some of us this can prove to be a pretty challenging decision.  I am talking about the BIG decisions.

For instance: Taking one job over another.  Moving ‘there’ or staying right where you are.  Follow your dreams or stay where it’s secure.

In the course of my life I have made many seemingly big decisions and every time I sat down to think them through, I got anxious.  I wanted to make the right decision!  My thoughts were clouded by all the pros and cons and I was overwhelmed by the options and how they would play out in the future.

I was at a crossroads and I didn’t know which way to go.

What I didn’t know then (but I know now), is that we all have an internal-decision-maker.  It’s called the heart.  Ok, maybe not the physical, blood pumping heart, but it’s the intuitive “heart” that can feel its way through situations.  The problem is we forget we have it because we have grown so accustomed to thinking our way through issues, we immediately try to do what is logical.  If you are like me, you may have found the logical route to be more than a bit rocky and instead downright miserable.

The work I do with clients is to help get them out of their heads and into their hearts.  Instead of thinking through the pros and cons of a situation, I want them to feel their way forward.  Our bodies are amazing and they can provide a lot of information about the decisions and choices we make on a daily basis.  I find that the ‘wrong’ choices (or at least not the best choice for me in the moment) feels restrictive to me.  My chest tightens and things just feel heavy overall.  However, when I make a choice from my heart and it is the ‘right’ choice, I feel expansive and an opening occurs in my chest.  I feel uplifted and light.  Those are my markers, but you may feel differently.  The key is tapping into your body every now and again (I suggest daily) to get to know the feelings that come up as you make your decisions.  It could help you immensely as you move forward along your path.

Now, I don’t believe in making ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ choices (even though sometimes it feels like there is one or the other).  I believe that every choice we make along our paths is an opportunity for growth, learning, and experience.  Whether you feel you have made the ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ decision, there is always an opportunity for you to move forward and make your dreams a reality.  Always.

But, in order to get there and enjoy it to the best of your ability, you must learn to tap into your intuitive heart and feel your way forward.  And that is why I have created something called Crossroad Coaching.  

Crossroad Coaching is for when you have those moments of uncertainty and you are unsure of which way to go.  You have a decision to make and are having trouble discerning what is best for you, right now.  That is where I come in.  I can help you tap into your intuitive heart and help you work out where the kinks might be, so you can feel good about your decision.  I want you to feel comfortable and confident in the decisions you make and I want you to step boldly into your future with the light, bright, and expansive feeling you have when you know everything is working out exactly as it should.  If you are interested in how Crossroad Coaching works, feel free to contact me and we can chat about your specific situation.

And should you find yourself questioning whether to follow your dreams now or later, take a look at this awesome video from Marie Forleo where she gives some insight to a reader who has a decision to make of her own.

It’s All About Love

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loveI love all things ‘love’.  As a Leo I am a hopeless romantic who enjoys all the traditional valentines gifts.  You know, chocolate, flowers, candles, perfume etc.  I enjoy it all.  I cry at happy endings to amazing love stories and anything that has a heart or the word ‘love’ on it you can bet your bottom dollar I want it.  But Valentines Day (and every other day of the year) isn’t just about romantic love.  We are moving into a world that offers a spirit of universal love in all forms and I LOVE that!

Not only are more people practicing random acts of kindness and sharing their love for humankind with one another, but we are moving into a period where more and more people are doing the work that they love.  More people are accepting their bodies, personalities, and true gifts each and every day.  More people are lending a helping hand when they see someone is in need and standing up for those who can’t speak for themselves.

It’s All About Love…keylove

Today and everyday, love yourself, treat yourself, and stop all that negative-dream-crushing-self-talk that keeps you playing small.  Be kind to others and to yourself!  Do more of what you love.  Find your gifts.  Love them and embrace them and for goodness sakes give them to the world!  Listen to your heart and follow the call to do work that you absolutely adore.  That passion you have burning in your soul, use it!  Support one another in struggles and successes.  Share, care, and collaborate when you can.  Uplift and motivate.  Inspire and ignite the fire that has been dormant for too many of us for far too long.

We are provided 24 amazing hours each day to live the best way we know how and I can’t think of a better way than to practice love in any way we can.  It’s simple to do if we can break away from our monkey minds, computers, smart phones, and get off of autopilot that we tend to be operating from most days.  Be conscious, aware, and open to how love may present itself to you.  You just might be surprised at how often you see, feel, and share it when you become aware.

And should you find yourself wondering where to begin, start with yourself.  Go out and do the things that bring you joy.  Paint, sing, write, crochet, dance, draw, read, take pictures, work out, create, or whatever it is that you haven’t given yourself the permission to do.  Go do that!

I truly believe life is meant to be enjoyed and love is meant to be shared, so get out there and do it!  And should you find yourself stuck, confused, or in a rut and unable to figure out how to move forward with your amazing passion, purpose, and dreams.  Know that I would be honored to be a part of your journey by sharing my gift of coaching with you.  There is nothing I love more than sharing in the excitement and wonder of my clients….except maybe chocolates and roses. 🙂

Now is your time to shine and do more of what you LOVE and I want to help you do that.  Contact me today to sign up for free consultation and find out how I can help you infuse your life with more love, inspiration, and joy.  You deserve it!

Why “Trying Harder” isn’t the Answer

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I cringe every time I hear the words “try harder”.  For some reason it sends the message that you just aren’t doing enough to make it (whatever it seems to be at the moment) happen.  It also suggests that if you are giving your all, it just isn’t enough.

Ick!  Just writing that makes me cringe.

I am not the kind of coach that is going to tell you to push through the pain and “try harder”.  I won’t tell you to power through or work harder at whatever you are doing. 

Why?

Because honestly, I care more than that and I don’t believe our dreams come true with blood, sweat, and tears (at least it doesn’t have to be that way).

I believe in a better way.

When clients come to me and say they are feeling stuck or in a standstill with the progression of their dreams, I try to tap into what they mean by “stuck”.  Are they stuck on ideas, actions, motivation, clients, or forward movement?  Do they need logistical assistance or is it an internal block we need to address?

Understanding where the glitch lies is paramount in helping them work through it.  Unlike how some sports coaches might tell players to work through the pain and “power through”, I just don’t believe in telling someone to “try harder”. 

I like to actually suggest the opposite.

Instead of pushing and fighting for the next step, what if you were able to take a step back and simple allow it to come to you?  What if you could relax, regroup, and trust that you don’t have to fight, claw, and force the answers to come.  What if right here, right now, you didn’t have to do anything?  What if they could simply flow….

In our society that is a big what if because we aren’t taught that growing up.  In school we are taught that if our grades aren’t high enough or if we aren’t doing well enough in a particular area, then we must try harder.  But what happens when we are giving our all and we still feel blocked?  What then?

Sometimes trying too hard pushes the thing we want to achieve, further away.  By forcing it and trying desperately to make it work, we cut off the flow of inspiration and energy.  We allow the frustration to settle in and when that happens, the fight gets harder.

Take writer’s block for instance.  For those of you who have ever experienced the Achilles heal of writing, you know the harder you try to force your words to flow, the harder it gets.  But, when you are able to step away, change your focus, get some fresh air, and then come back to it, it seems as if the clouds part and the heavenly writing angels sing.  Your thoughts turn into beautiful words that when weaved together create a tapestry of creative-awesomeness. flow

I believe the sweet spot for your dreams to become reality is in your inspiration.  When it feels hard, sticky, frustrating, or like your progress has reached a plateau, the answer is not to try harder. 

The answer lies in letting go of the reins and creating the space for your next step to appear.

How do you do that?  Here are a few things that I find helpful. 

  • Change your focus to something else. 
  • Sing, dance, or listen to music. 
  • Read a good book, go for a run, or do some yoga. 
  • Meditate, have coffee with your friends, or write in your journal. 
  • Laugh, smile, or do something nice for someone else. 
  • Take a hot shower, get a massage, or go for a walk.
  • Enjoy some time in nature, breathe deeply, and remember that all is working out for you.
  • Remember you don’t have to have it all done right this moment, but trust that you will have it done.
  • Enjoy the journey.  It’s so easy to get caught up in the decisions, steps, and plans we have in life, but in the grand scheme of things, the juice is in the journey.  Enjoy it!

You may find that your sticking points are scattered along your path as things grow and evolve, but if you can remember to flow instead of forcing the next step to come, you will not only soon be celebrating your dreams becoming reality, but will also find that you had fun along the way!